‘Fine’ does not describe a feeling
I RECENTLY attended a seminar where the speaker had one golden rule: any time he asked how we were going with the content, we were not allowed to respond with ‘good’.
After having a bit of fun with all the synonyms of good (great! excellent! etc), we were forced to dig deeper.
In doing so, we had to think about our response instead of defaulting to the surface-level reply we usually give.
I notice the same default responses coming up in everyday conversations as well. Especially when we are asked ‘how are you?’
And while ‘fine, thanks’ is an automatic response for many of us, it’s important we remember that fine is not a feeling.
Instead, I encourage you to dig deeper. To interrupt the pattern by stopping and thinking about how you are really feeling. To identify the emotion and then have the courage to articulate it.
In doing so, you’ll reassure others that it’s okay to speak up. In fact, it’s necessary. Because once we recognise the emotions that are at play – whether it’s excitement, worry or frustration – then at least there’s a starting point for real connection to take place.
From here, anything is possible and always work-out-able.
And with that I ask, ‘How are you today?’ Let’s get the ball rolling and share what’s really going on. It’s a conversation that can make a big difference.
■ Patti Williams will be guest speaker at the GGGB Girls’ Night In being held at Settlers Private Room on October 13.
❝To interrupt the pattern by stopping and thinking about how you are really feeling.
CARING: Care packages handed out to Hello World. HOW ARE YOU, REALLY? GGGB care packs are dropped off at Biloela Discount Chemist for R U OK Day.
Care Packages handed out to Digital Footstep.