Find the edge of glory!

Want to spice up your sex life or solo sesh? We have just the thing that’ll re­ally push you over the edge...

Cosmopolitan (Australia) - - Contents -

IN MOST CASES, BE­ING A TEASE IS JUST MEAN. The one time it’s any­thing but? Dur­ing sex. In fact, teas­ing out plea­sure can ac­tu­ally lead to an or­gasm more­over­the­top than a Cardi B verse.

En­ter edg­ing, the prac­tice of pur­pose­fully build­ing up to and then de­lay­ing a cli­max, so that when you fi­nally do let go, the bliss is ex­tra in­tense. ‘It cre­ates an­tic­i­pa­tion, and when you draw that out, you’re able to savour the fi­nal mo­ment so much more,’ ex­plains sex and re­la­tion­ships coach Dawn Serra. Phys­i­cally, pro­long­ing a re­lease means your body has am­ple time to di­rect blood f low to the nerves and mus­cles in your pelvis and gen­i­tals, mak­ing those ar­eas hy­per­sen­si­tive... and your fin­ish feel even more amaz­ing.

Edg­ing also de­liv­ers the cov­eted perk of more time in the sack. One study found that women wish they could add nearly eight more min­utes on to the av­er­age 11 to 13 min­utes of fore­play and about seven more on to the av­er­age seven to eight min­utes of in­ter­course. And since it takes most guys around two to four min­utes of P­in­the­V ac­tion to cli­max and women of­ten at least 10, edg­ing can be a game changer.

Be­fore you at­tempt to stretch things out, know this: ‘Edg­ing with a part­ner is tricky be­cause they need to pause ex­actly when you need them to,’ says sex ther­a­pist Vanessa Marin, founder of Fin­ish­ing School, an on­line or­gasm course for women. ‘Lin­ger­ing for even a sec­ond longer can cause you to or­gasm.’ To get it right, dur­ing fore­play, ask your part­ner to plea­sure you down there us­ing their fin­gers or tongue in a pat­tern (side­to­side, up­and­down, or cir­cu­lar mo­tions) that feels good. When you sense you’re get­ting close, give a clear ver­bal sig­nal, like ‘wait,’ ‘stop,’ or ‘ohmy­godthat’s so­good­but­please­hold.’ A few sec­onds later, have them start again, but this time with a dif­fer­ent move­ment pat­tern than be­fore, sug­gests Serra. (You can re­turn the favour by bring­ing your S.O. to the brink and back too.)

Keep up this stop­and­go to re­boot and boost your arousal, and when you can’t hold out any longer, let your mate bring you all the way to or­gasm. Or switch to in­ter­course, slow­ing down on thrust­ing when one of you comes close to peak­ing, says Marin. The ex­plo­sive end­ing will be to­tally worth it.

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