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You’ve been pretty tight for a while now and feel like you’re on bestie level, but does she feel the same? Here, we help you spot the dif­fer­ence be­tween a pal and a BFFL.

on pa­per, good friends and best friends share a lot of the same traits like re­ly­ing on each other to dou­ble tap your Insta pics, help­ing each other find the perf foun­da­tion to match your skin­tone, pro­vid­ing moral sup­port when your fave se­ries is axed and so on. But, ac­cord­ing to Kim Smith, a teenage ex­pert and founder of Stand­ing Strong (girls­stand­, a well­ness club for girls, a BFF-wor­thy friend­ship re­quires a cer­tain spe­cial, unique bond.

“Friends are peo­ple we en­joy hang­ing out with but they might not know ev­ery­thing about us, or they might not be the peo­ple we turn to when we’re in need of help,” says Kim. “Best friends have a deeper level of close­ness. They are some­one you can trust and feel you can share al­most any­thing with.”

‘So like, what are we?’

OK, it’s not go­ing to go down like that, but the best way to fig­ure out if your mate is your best friend is by do­ing what friends do best: talk­ing it out!

The bestie con­ver­sa­tion is one of the most im­por­tant ones you’ll ever have with your friend. Sure, it can be a nerver­ack­ing process, but DW, we’ve got some epic ad­vice to help you keep the awks to a min­i­mum.

“Some­times you have to put your­self out there for great things to hap­pen. Be brave and tell them how you feel,” Kim in­sists. “If you’re too shy then tell them straight up. You could say some­thing like: ‘I feel like we’re be­com­ing besties.’ This way you aren’t putting your­self out there com­pletely. Wait and see what they say back. If they feel the same way, you’ll be call­ing each other bestie by the end of the day!”

And if they’re not quite on the same level as you, then that’s OK! This means that she’s just a great friend of yours

(which is still amaz­ing!) and your true

BFF could be right around the cor­ner.

What if you don’t have a bestie?

If you’ve got­ten this far into the story and are think­ing, ‘Hey, I ac­tu­ally don’t have a bestie, does that make me weird?’ then the an­swer is ab­so­lutely not!

“It’s nor­mal to change friend­ships, have friend­ship breakups and make­ups, have lots of friends, have no friends, have just friends and have best friends,” Kim ex­plains.

So if you don’t have a bestie just yet, this doesn’t mean that you’ll never have one. It just means that per­son hasn’t en­tered your life yet.

Hav­ing lots of friends but no best friend means you have the free­dom to move around your friend­ship groups and not be at­tached to one per­son. En­joy this time and make the most of it. Be­fore you know it you’ll be paired with some­one who thinks you’re the best thing since straw­berry flavoured Oreos.

“Al­though it can some­times feel lonely not hav­ing a best friend, it’s a good time to put some love and time into your­self,” Kim says. “The most im­por­tant friend­ship you will ever have is the one you have with your­self.”

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