I’VE AN ALLCOMPANY WORK FUNC­TION COM­ING UP – ANY AP­PRO­PRI­ATE JOKES TO BREAK THE ICE WITH COL­LEAGUES I’VE NEVER MET?

GQ (Australia) - - SOURCE - JIM, VIA EMAIL

You know what they say about leav­ing com­edy to co­me­di­ans. Still, if you must, this won’t of­fend and outs you as a man familiar with Buck­ley and/or Leonard Co­hen. Q. How many singer/ song­writ­ers does it take to cover Jeff Buck­ley’s ‘Hal­lelu­jah’? A: All of them. MY PART­NER IS FULLY INTO ASTROL­OGY. I THINK IT’S BOL­LOCKS. HOW DO WE FIND MID­DLE GROUND? PHILLIP, VIA EMAIL There’s a sim­ple an­swer here Phil – you can’t. So, make that Uranus joke you’ve been hold­ing off for years, put an end to things and change the locks. A COL­LEAGUE USES ‘LOL’ AND ‘HASH­TAG AWK­WARD’ IN CON­VER­SA­TION. I WANT TO SLAP HIM – BUT DON’T WANT TO GET FIRED. HELP? MARIKA, VIA EMAIL The time has come to rofl some feath­ers. Sorry. What to do? Well, ev­ery time he drops into this teenage douchebag per­sona, sim­ply re­spond with a, “Thanks, Mi­ley.” The key is per­sis­tence. Don’t blink first. He’ll get the mes­sage. Hope­fully. Fail­ing that, pack up your desk and slap away.

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