Bidding farewell to our back page.
We’re penning you this Open Letter to say thanks for the memories, even though we just sicked-up in our mouth on quoting Fall Out Boy. Anyway, what we’re saying is things are going down, much like Pete Wentz’ popularity. And by that, we mean we’re moving on to (back) pages new. Yep, as any footballer who’s just lost a grand final has so poetically opined: “We’ve had a good run, but all things must come to an end…eh.” We had some fun. Remember that time we singled out ‘chef’ Pete Evans for being a right dick well before the tabloids took aim? Back in the days when he was more concerned with activating almonds than the actual harming of babies and expectant mothers? And who can forget our classic take down of charity-minded colleagues (wankers) or the Ikea horsemeat scandal (giddy-up)? We were there to inform new dads that their debut progeny was no excuse for letting things slide – muscularly and sartorially – and we eagerly espoused the joys of a sporting affair on the arrival of each football season. But then 2016 came along, and it was all death, despair and Donald. And quite frankly, it’s that last square peg who’s brought about this split, because we don’t want every back page from here to be about ignorance, misogyny and improbable foreign policy. Or worse. So it is that we unlink our hands and march on ahead to a spanking new little number we can’t wait to take for a twirl next issue. Out.