How to im­prove your sex­ual relationship with your part­ner

Great Health Guide - - CONTENTS - Dr Matthew An­der­son

IN the May is­sue of Great Health GuideTM, I stated that over 2000 women clients have pro­vided rea­sons for not be­ing sex­u­ally at­tracted to their hus­band or part­ner.

They have shared many rea­sons but those rea­sons ALL fall into two sim­ple and dis­tinct cat­e­gories. The first rea­son dis­cussed in Great Health GuideTM was: You don’t act like a man. In this is­sue, I will dis­cuss the sec­ond main rea­son: You don’t act like an adult. The fact is adults only want sex with other adults. Sex­ual in­ti­macy be­tween hu­mans is de­signed to be con­ducted be­tween two con­sent­ing adults. If one part­ner ex­hibits too much child­ish or im­ma­ture be­hav­ior, then her or his part­ner will nat­u­rally lose in­ter­est. For ex­am­ple, if a part­ner (male or fe­male) be­haves like a child, the nat­u­ral in­cest taboo is ac­ti­vated and the other part­ner, who is be­hav­ing as an adult or a par­ent, will nat­u­rally avoid sex­ual con­tact. Adults and par­ents are pro­grammed to avoid sex­ual con­tact with chil­dren even if that child is phys­i­cally over one-year-old.

What fol­lows are rea­sons or ex­am­ples of things men do or don’t do, that cause loss of sex­ual in­ter­est in their part­ners. Most, if not all ex­am­ples, can be con­nected to the fol­low­ing two rea­sons and ap­ply to over 95% of men:

too lit­tle mas­cu­line en­ergy or be­hav­ior


too much child­ish be­hav­iours.

You don’t act like an adult: Count­less wives make state­ments such as: ‘I gave birth to two chil­dren but I of­ten feel as if I have three’. These wives are turned off sex­u­ally be­cause they ex­pe­ri­ence their hus­bands as im­ma­ture or child­ish. Adult women do not find chil­dren or ado­les­cents sex­u­ally attractive. As I stated above, adult hu­man be­ings are nat­u­rally struc­tured to avoid sex with chil­dren and ado­les­cents. If a wife has a con­stant ex­pe­ri­ence of her hus­band as im­ma­ture, she will quickly lose a de­sire to con­nect with him sex­u­ally. Yes, he may be a good guy and he may have quite a few pos­i­tive qual­i­ties. How­ever, if he acts like a child too of­ten, she will not be at­tracted to him.

A man will be seen as child­ish/ado­les­cent if he fre­quently grabs his wife’s be­hind, makes ado­les­cent jokes, re­fuses to take adult re­spon­si­bil­ity for bills, or­di­nary house­hold chores and child­care, takes his chil­dren’s side against his wife, does not prac­tice good hy­giene, tries to turn all phys­i­cal con­tact into sex­ual fore­play, makes sports (watch­ing or view­ing) more im­por­tant than qual­ity time with her, can­not be emo­tion­ally in­ti­mate, re­fuses to learn to dress him­self ap­pro­pri­ately, does not pick up af­ter him­self,

has to con­stantly be re­minded to han­dle nor­mal re­spon­si­bil­i­ties, avoids dis­ci­plin­ing the chil­dren…the list is end­less but the point is clear. Too many men act like chil­dren and then get up­set be­cause their wives do not re­spond to their ad­vances. Pay at­ten­tion, act like a man and make some adult de­ci­sions. She will love you for it!

Dr Matthew An­der­son has a Doc­tor of Min­istry spe­cial­is­ing in coun­selling. He has ex­ten­sive train­ing and ex­pe­ri­ence in Gestalt and Jun­gian Psy­chol­ogy and has helped many peo­ple suc­cess­fully nav­i­gate relationship is­sues. Dr An­der­son has a best-sell­ing book, ‘The Res­ur­rec­tion of Ro­mance’ and he may be con­tacted via his web­site.

De­sign Olek­san­dra Zuieva

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