THE IMPORTANCE OF SEX PART 2
How to improve your sexual relationship with your partner
IN the May issue of Great Health GuideTM, I stated that over 2000 women clients have provided reasons for not being sexually attracted to their husband or partner.
They have shared many reasons but those reasons ALL fall into two simple and distinct categories. The first reason discussed in Great Health GuideTM was: You don’t act like a man. In this issue, I will discuss the second main reason: You don’t act like an adult. The fact is adults only want sex with other adults. Sexual intimacy between humans is designed to be conducted between two consenting adults. If one partner exhibits too much childish or immature behavior, then her or his partner will naturally lose interest. For example, if a partner (male or female) behaves like a child, the natural incest taboo is activated and the other partner, who is behaving as an adult or a parent, will naturally avoid sexual contact. Adults and parents are programmed to avoid sexual contact with children even if that child is physically over one-year-old.
What follows are reasons or examples of things men do or don’t do, that cause loss of sexual interest in their partners. Most, if not all examples, can be connected to the following two reasons and apply to over 95% of men:
too little masculine energy or behavior
too much childish behaviours.
You don’t act like an adult: Countless wives make statements such as: ‘I gave birth to two children but I often feel as if I have three’. These wives are turned off sexually because they experience their husbands as immature or childish. Adult women do not find children or adolescents sexually attractive. As I stated above, adult human beings are naturally structured to avoid sex with children and adolescents. If a wife has a constant experience of her husband as immature, she will quickly lose a desire to connect with him sexually. Yes, he may be a good guy and he may have quite a few positive qualities. However, if he acts like a child too often, she will not be attracted to him.
A man will be seen as childish/adolescent if he frequently grabs his wife’s behind, makes adolescent jokes, refuses to take adult responsibility for bills, ordinary household chores and childcare, takes his children’s side against his wife, does not practice good hygiene, tries to turn all physical contact into sexual foreplay, makes sports (watching or viewing) more important than quality time with her, cannot be emotionally intimate, refuses to learn to dress himself appropriately, does not pick up after himself,
has to constantly be reminded to handle normal responsibilities, avoids disciplining the children…the list is endless but the point is clear. Too many men act like children and then get upset because their wives do not respond to their advances. Pay attention, act like a man and make some adult decisions. She will love you for it!
Dr Matthew Anderson has a Doctor of Ministry specialising in counselling. He has extensive training and experience in Gestalt and Jungian Psychology and has helped many people successfully navigate relationship issues. Dr Anderson has a best-selling book, ‘The Resurrection of Romance’ and he may be contacted via his website.