ARE You Killing YOUR Dream?

Great Health Guide - - FRONT PAGE - Words Dr Matthew An­der­son De­sign Olek­san­dra Zuieva

What is a dream?

A dream is, your high­est hope, big­gest chal­lenge, best pos­si­ble out­come for your work, re­la­tion­ship and/or life.

There are two kinds of dream-killers. The in­ter­nal killers and the ex­ter­nal killers. Both of them are dan­ger­ous to your alive­ness and your con­scious­ness. This ar­ti­cle fo­cuses on in­ter­nal dream killers, who they are and how to han­dle them.

We all have in­ter­nal dream killers and they are ver­sions of their ex­ter­nal sib­lings. They show up when­ever we be­gin to en­ter­tain new pos­si­bil­i­ties or dream big­ger dreams and they share char­ac­ter­is­tics sim­i­lar to the Ex­ter­nal Dream Killers. Take a look at the list be­low:

1. Be­liefs, at­ti­tudes and per­cep­tions that sup­port and even cre­ate fears that block your path to self-ex­pres­sion and dream build­ing. Th­ese thoughts val­i­date fear and per­suade you to ac­cept and honor your fears.

2. A too-small self-im­age. About 95% of us (you in­cluded) grossly un­der­es­ti­mate our po­ten­tial. Then we use this lim­ited and fixed idea of our­selves to de­fine who, what and how we can be or be­come. Sadly, most of us sel­dom ques­tion this life defin­ing idea and we con­struct our work, re­la­tion­ships and dreams within the small box it places us in.

3. The triv­i­al­iza­tion of our­selves and our dreams. Th­ese are thoughts and be­liefs that con­vince us that we are not im­por­tant. Who we are, what we want and what we could be­come, is es­sen­tially triv­ial and in­con­se­quen­tial.

4. The lack of an in­ter­nal cheer­leader. We lis­ten so closely to the other in­ter­nal dream killers. We ig­nore or even kill, our in­ner cheer­leader. This has tragic re­sults be­cause it de­prives us of the en­ergy that we need to fol­low through with ideas and be­gin­ning plans, for our hopes and dreams.

I in­vite you to take a look in­side and see if you can iden­tify any or all of the toxic voices that are de­scribed in the list above. Ev­ery­one has at least some. As­sume that you have your share. Re­mem­ber, aware­ness is the first step in sig­nif­i­cant change.

BE­LOW ARE SOME KEY WAYS TO OVER­COME IN­TER­NAL DREAM KILLERS. 1. Iden­tify them in de­tail.

Write them down. Make notes about the dream killing thoughts and be­liefs and at­ti­tudes that plague your days and nights. Putting them down in black and white will give you some power over them. Then you can go on to the next step.

2. Con­front them.

You can learn to con­front your in­ter­nal dream killers in the same way you deal with the ex­ter­nal killers. Imag­ine that your thoughts are sep­a­rate en­ti­ties that can be spo­ken to and tell them to SHUT UP!

3. Learn to think of your in­ter­nal dream killers as abu­sive.

You will be bet­ter able to re­sist them. The fact is – they are abu­sive. Left alone, with­out con­fronta­tion, they will dam­age or com­pletely block your abil­ity to ex­plore and/or man­i­fest your dreams. If you see them as abu­sive and de­struc­tive, then you will be more mo­ti­vated to fight back when they be­gin to spread their poi­son in your mind.

IF YOU PER­SON­ALLY FIND THAT YOU HAVE IN­TER­NAL DREAM KILLERS IN YOUR LIFE THEN THE AC­TION STEPS BE­LOW WILL HELP YOU GET FREE. 1. Make a list of all the In­ter­nal Dream Killer thoughts that plague and poi­son your mind.

De­scribe them in de­tail. In­clude af­ter each one its ef­fects on you and your mo­ti­va­tion.

2. Be­gin a pro­gram of com­plete in­tol­er­ance.

When your in­ter­nal dream killers ap­pear, at­tack them, tell them to SHUT UP and re­place them with pos­i­tive and en­cour­ag­ing thoughts and ac­tions.

3. Find a cheer­leader.

You may al­ready have some­one in your life who does this for you. If so, spend more time shar­ing your dreams and plans with them. Be sure to in­clude con­crete plans of ac­tion. Spend to­day hon­or­ing and re­spect­ing your dreams. The world needs you and what you have to share.

Dr Matthew An­der­son, Doc­tor of Min­istry spe­cial­izes in coun­selling. He has ex­ten­sive train­ing and ex­pe­ri­ence in Gestalt and Jun­gian Psy­chol­ogy and has helped many peo­ple suc­cess­fully nav­i­gate re­la­tion­ship is­sues. Dr An­der­son has a best-sell­ing book, ‘The Res­ur­rec­tion of Ro­mance’ and he may be con­tacted via his web­site.

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