The idea of turn­ing an old jumper into a hand­bag floats my boat

Herald Sun - Switched On - - Weekly Preview -

IHAVE just turned 33. Is it wrong for some­one my age to be ob­sessed with Bet­ter Homes and Gar­dens? No, this isn’t one of those rhetor­i­cal ques­tions, it’s ok to tell me I’m a freak.

And the thing is, it’s not a new ad­dic­tion . . . I’ve been watch­ing it re­li­giously since way back in 1996 (bless, I was only 19 then).

Yep, I’m the per­fect ex­am­ple of a 1950s house­wife ... ex­cept I seem to be missing the hus­band part.

The idea of turn­ing an old jumper into a hand­bag, or be­ing shown how to make a piece of art­work us­ing only a piece of PVC pipe and some paint, floats my boat.

I take sewing classes for plea­sure and right now I’m work­ing out how to make my nephew an Ig­gle Pig­gle t-shirt (I per­son­ally think the lit­tle fella in blue and his non­speak­ing friends are a bit creepy, but the kid loves what the kid loves, so whatchya gonna do?).

I’ve been an old soul my whole life, heck, I even had a choco­late-mak­ing busi­ness by age 12. I would walk around the old folks’ home across the road with my hand-crafted good­ies and make a for­tune. Look­ing back now, I cringe at what I must have done to di­a­betes lev­els at that place.

In my one-bed­room unit in the in­ner city, I don’t get many op­por­tu­ni­ties to build a child’s play­ground.

And it doesn’t mat­ter that I will never un­der­take half of the projects on this show, and the ones I do start will sit un­fin­ished in a cup­board for many, many years.

Or that I will never build my own per­gola. I like know­ing that I could, if my life de­pended on it (I have no idea what sce­nario lends it­self to my life hang­ing on me build­ing a per­gola, but it’s bet­ter to be safe than sorry). I love BH&G in the same way I’m ob­sessed with Re­lo­ca­tion, Re­lo­ca­tion — even though I will never sell my (imag­i­nary) London pad for a farm in the English coun­try­side. It’s just en­ter­tain­ing. I have un­nat­u­ral fear of gela­tine, so I won’t be try­ing Karen’s rasp­berry jelly with rose-scented yo­ghurt this week, but how can you ig­nore Fast Ed with words of wis­dom like: ‘‘ For all its fancy name, kofta’s re­ally just a spicy ris­sole, formed into a sausage, chucked onto a stick and whacked onto a BBQ, it’s so easy.’’

This week Dr Harry sorts out a pool-crazy poo­dle and we head home with singer Kasey Cham­bers, who I wish would just get rid of that ghastly pierc­ing (see, told you I was an old woman trapped in a semiy­oung woman’s body).

Next week is the Christ­mas Spe­cial . . . teach me how to hand-make some Chrissy paper oh wise (wo)man Tara. Feel­ing Bet­ter: Kasey Cham­bers with sons Arlo and Talon and host Jo­hanna Griggs.

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