That’s the kind of thing I watch TV for

Herald Sun - Switched On - - On The Couch -

LAST week on The Block: Day 46. Un­til this se­ries I think the last time I heard any­thing re­ferred to like this was the Iran Hostage Cri­sis in 1979. 1980. 1981 . . . So is the auc­tion episode tonight — Wed­nes­day — Day 47? I don’t know if we can au­to­mat­i­cally as­sume it is. It ac­tu­ally took place last night and I’m imag­in­ing there are high-level talks right now at Chan­nel 9 about how to have the in­ter­net de­clared il­le­gal be­tween now and the next se­ries.

God wouldn’t it have been some­thing if all those can­dles burned Chez and Brenton’s apart­ment down last week? That’s the kind of thing I watch tele­vi­sion for. No­body would’ve been hurt. Chez and Brenton were out hav­ing din­ner at Aria, en­joy­ing the har­bour view from their ta­ble fac­ing the kitchen. Did Chez end up hav­ing the de­crus­ta­tion menu, do you think?

And why did the pro­duc­ers leave that in, poor lit­tle Chez pro­nounc­ing de­crus­ta­tion like an out of towner? And about that ring — we were clearly left think­ing Brenton paid $278,000 for it, but I’m go­ing to make a guess here and say he didn’t. Do you think he had a re­think about the whole thing when she started scream­ing SHUT UP at him over and over? Do you think he had a brief alarm­ing pre­scient in­sight into how his life might go? Or was he just re­lieved the place was still stand­ing and he hadn’t re­turned to a smoul­der­ing pile of Free­dom fur­ni­ture?

I loved the ring-in painters scan­dal too. There should’ve been a bit more of that. John and Neisha seemed to be overly up­set by it though. Or Neisha mainly. Not sure why. She was con­vinced Jake and Erin had cheated be­fore and it was just the first time they’d been caught. It was hardly cheat­ing though, given the level of as­sis­tance ev­ery­one got on this show. Still, Neisha will for­give but she will never ever for­get. She’s in ne­go­ti­a­tions now for the next se­ries of Un­der­belly. John looks like Ed­die Per­fect if Ed­die let his regrowth go.

I know they got the right peo­ple for this show be­cause they’ve an­noyed me and amused me dis­pro­por­tion­ately at var­i­ous times dur­ing the course of the se­ries. And nor­mally it’s the con­tes­tants I get con­fused on re­al­ity shows, but not this time. No, it was the apart­ments here— I couldn’t tell one from the other.

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