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REID’S wor­ried be­cause he only read five books last week. He doesn’t say what those books were. Agatha Christie? Maybe he found he only got through five 19th-cen­tury Rus­sian au­thors with long names, in which case, well, pos­si­bly he is be­com­ing a schiz­o­phrenic. That’s what he’s up­set about.

His mother’s one, you re­alise, and it ap­pears there’s one go­ing around Port­land stab­bing peo­ple un­til they’re good and dead, and so now Reid, what with the headaches and the dis­turbed sleep pat­terns and the not-meet­ing-hisweekly-book-quota, is start­ing to think maybe he’s one, too.

There are, of course, dif­fer­ent types of schizophren­ics. Not all of them of the stab­bing va­ri­ety. This one does three mur­ders and I’ll break it down for you: 31, 41, 71. That’s the num­ber of times he stabs each per­son.

Seventy-one is fairly com­mit­ted, wouldn’t you say? The deaths look like a Man­son fam­ily kind of thing at the be­gin­ning, ‘‘ or the geno­cide in Dar­fur’’, Rossi (Joe Man­tegna) weighs in gravely. Geno­cide in Dar­fur?

That’s this show all over — a pre­ten­tious lot of bol­locks.

They’ve re­placed Pren­tiss, who is ap­par­ently dead, with a

Grave: Joe Man­tegna ‘‘ pro­ba­tion­ary’’ of­fi­cer in the form of Seaver, but she’s no ex­pe­ri­enced pro­filer.

They need one, and they need one now, Hotch tells Rossi as they have cel­e­bra­tory cup­cakes brought in from home by Pene­lope.

She’s not thrilled about all the testos­terone around her now, she says, but she doesn’t seem too con­cerned about be­ing in prox­im­ity to Shemar Moore, you’ll no­tice.

He calls her ‘‘ baby girl’’ in the mid­dle of a deeply im­por­tant meet­ing about stab­bing.

It’s fairly dis­con­cert­ing, yet also ap­pro­pri­ate some­how com­ing from him.

I didn’t mind the end­ing tonight, though. The fi­nal scene — it’s a tiny bit creepy, and I don’t mind a bit of that. Crim­i­nal Minds Chan­nel 7, 8.30pm

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