DIANNE BUT­LER OUT OF THE BOX

Herald Sun - Switched On - - Weekly Preview -

CSI New York, the high-end CSI, hasn’t gone at all — it’s on GEM. A tremen­dous re­lief to all of you, I’m sure. It’s a bit of a dis­turb­ing open­ing tonight though.

Stella and Mac — who sound as if they could be the name of an Ital­ian ham­burger but who, in fact, are a pair of de­tec­tives played by at least one very good ac­tor — are go­ing down the street, car­ry­ing a Christ­mas tree.

There’s some idle chat go­ing on about child­hood mem­o­ries. It re­minded me, to a very tiny de­gree, of the scene in The God­fa­ther where Kay and Michael are walk­ing to their ho­tel and Kay sees the news­pa­per head­line ‘‘ Vito Cor­leone Feared Mur­dered’’.

And, well, it’s all over for Kay from that point.

It was prob­a­bly too am- bi­tious think­ing there’d be some kind of God­fa­ther mo­ment in CSI New York.

In­stead, tonight’s dead per­son is a home­less man who’s been run over. Or is it?

At first he looked as if he’d been de­lib­er­ately set alight and left to die.

But af­ter fur­ther in­quiries it emerges he’d been de­lib­er­ately run over and burnt with petrol and left to die; a vastly more hands-off crime, and

Fab­u­lous: Kim Kar­dashian there­fore not nearly so ter­ri­ble. Plus he wasn’t home­less.

Stella re­mem­bers him from back when he had stringy hair and body odour and she used to give him small amounts of money, and squat down on her haunches and coun­sel him about turn­ing his life around.

Well, some­thing must’ve taken, be­cause he ended up with a beau­ti­ful girl­friend and pos­si­bly mur­dered by a suspect who goes out with Deb­bie Fal­lon. Who is — brace your­selves — played by Kim Kar­dashian. Yes. She’s the fab­u­lous guest star, look­ing like the KK we’re fa­mil­iar with: Ex­treme makeup, ex­tra hair.

It’s a small role, not a lot of di­a­logue, some mean­ing­ful star­ing, but it’s ter­ri­bly im­por­tant. As is only fit­ting re­ally. CSI New York GEM, 8.30pm

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