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IT’S pos­si­ble this is the youngest place we’ve ever seen on Grand De­signs — a ’ 70s bun­ga­low. That’s 1970s, which must make it the youngest by cen­turies. Plus it’s very sturdy — no vines, no bats, no ord­nance from English Her­itage hold­ing this one up.

Maybe that’s why the own­ers, Lisa and Lin­coln, are stand­ing there next to Kevin McCloud look­ing at it like it’s the worst house they’ve ever seen, even though Lisa al­leges she finds bun­ga­lows charm­ing.

Just not this one, crazy paving fire­place not­with­stand­ing. They’ve moved here to the Isle of Wight to get out of Lon­don.

They’ve de­cided it’s a bet­ter venue to bring up Lisa’s daugh­ter, and I as­sume the dog, blah blah, the same sorts of things all these couples say on this show.

She’s an artist, he’s an ar­chi­tect — again, ba­si­cally the same sorts of jobs they all have — and this is go­ing to be their ‘‘ ex­per­i­men­tal wood­land house’’. Ex­per­i­men­tal all right — they’re plan­ning on putting yo­ghurt on it and then ap­ply­ing a blow­torch to it.

It’s not just yo­ghurt on its own ei­ther. No. Lisa co-opts Kevin, they glove up and start mix­ing — cow dung and yo­ghurt. Kevin’s not shy with

Co-opted: Kevin McCloud

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