PUB DE­BATE

SHOULD FOOTY’S BIG IN­DI­VID­UAL HON­OURS STILL TAKE GENTLEMANLY CON­DUCT INTO AC­COUNT?

Inside Sport - - CONTENTS -

“It doesn’t do the medal any good when a bloke dom­i­nates, but gets his chance taken away be­cause he put on a sloppy tackle back in round five.”

af­ter 1 beer REASONED AR­GU­MENTS IF Y OU’RE A TRA­DI­TION­AL­IST

“It’s a dis­tinct part of our game. Let the rest of the world ob­sess about who is ‘most valu­able’. You can cre­ate an award to­mor­row – and it seems like ev­ery­one has one, from the play­ers to the coaches to the me­dia. But you can’t im­me­di­ately make these gongs im­por­tant. Only time can do that, and it’s our best-and-fairests like the Brown­low and Dally M that have the his­tory to them.”

IF YOU RE­ALLY TAKE AWARDS SE­RI­OUSLY

“Be­cause they re­main the most es­teemed of in­di­vid­ual hon­ours, the medals should re­flect who ac­tu­ally was the out­stand­ing player of the sea­son. It doesn’t do the medal any good when a bloke dom­i­nates the comp that year but gets his chance taken away be­cause he put on a sloppy tackle back in round five.”

IF YOU BE­LIEVE IN PURE FOO TY HE­ROES

“I’m in­vok­ing Rev­erend Love­joy’s wife: would some­one please think about the chil­dren? In our footy codes, it’s not just about play­ing well, but play­ing the right way. Im­pres­sion­able youths should be able to look up to the medal­list with­out hav­ing to deal with the moral con­fu­sion of, ‘He’s a cham­pion, but he’s also a grub.’”

af­ter 2 b eers DIVERSIONARY TANGENTS IF IN­HER­ENT BIAS RE­ALLY BUGS Y OU

“The sys­tem it­self is un­fair. It favours the guys who are around the ball all the time, or in the case of the AFL, have fair hair that the um­pires can read­ily no­tice. Wake me up when a back­man or a prop finally gets the medal around his neck.”

WHAT IS FAIR ANY­WAY?

“Why is fair­ness equated with no sus­pen­sions in a sea­son? If a foot­baller commiŒed atroc­i­ties all his ca­reer, yet fig­ured out how to stay on the tri­bunal’s good side for one year and went on to win the medal, can that re­ally be con­sid­ered fair? And why, in sports that have more than two dozen men on the field, do we award votes three, two and one?”

af­ter 3 b eers RAISED VOICES IF Y OU’RE A REVISIONIST

“If the AFL ever does re­move the ‘fairest’ part from the Brown­low equa­tion, does that mean Chris Grant and Corey McKer­nan should re­ceive medals for top­ping the count? And should the NRL award a Dally M for 2003, when the cer­e­mony was can­celled? They might find them­selves deal­ing with an­other boycoŒed night at some point again.”

IF YOU LIKE REDCAR­PET FASH­ION

“The real pur­pose of these medals now is the cer­e­mony. It’s for leaguies to look awk­ward in black tie, or the sig­nif­i­cant oth­ers of AFL play­ers to get gawked at in cou­ture. The real ques­tion is not whether we should hold onto the ‘fairest’ part; it’s why is the en­ter­tain­ment al­ways some­one like Alex Lloyd?”

af­ter 4 beers IM­PROB­A­BLE HYPOTHETICALS IF Y OU’RE INT O DEMOC­RACY … OR MOB RULE

“Why should an ex­pert panel pick the Dally M? And don’t get me started on why um­pires are still hand­ing out Brown­low votes – who­ever came up with the idea back in the day that foot­ballers would re­spect of­fi­cials more be­cause they did the vot­ing surely spent too much time in the opium den. Let the fans vote for this!”

IF YOU’RE RE­ALLY A REVISIONIST

“The AFL re­ally opened up the prover­bial Pan­dora’s when they stripped Jobe Wat­son of his Brown­low. Why not re­visit du­bi­ous Brown­low win­ners and ad­mit, ‘You know what, there was a mis­take that year.’ [Yes, you, Shane Woe­wodin!] And how is it that FiŒler, Lock­yer or Inglis have never won a Dally M?”

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