Simone’s quick-start guide to leveraging your solo mum assets
I truly believe we all get the same number of opportunities – it’s just that some people either don’t recognise them or don’t know how to grab them with both hands. The following quick-start guide is designed to help you think differently to turn almost a
WHAT ARE YOUR OBJECTIVES?
What does your ideal day look like? Regularly check in with yourself and remain focused and committed to what you really want. Have fun cutting out pictures and words that make up your ideal life.
IF YOU'VE GOT IT, FLAUNT IT!
Spend some time writing down everything you see as an asset and a liability, then write down how it could be of value to you or someone else. For example: I don’t have my children half the time, this means I have the freedom to do XYZ. If you don't have the answer right now, leave a space to come back to it. This is a fantastic exercise to do with a close friend who can help you see a different perspective.
STEP 3: REVIEW THE PEOPLE YOU HAVE AROUND YOU
What do you need to achieve your objectives and make your ideal life a reality? Are the people around you energising you or draining you? Are these relationships win-win? Are there any relationships you need to step away from or any you need to attract and nurture?
STEP 4: FIT YOUR OWN OXYGEN MASK THEN HELP OTHERS
Look at what you need to do for yourself first, then at what can you offer to others and how they could help you in return. As a solo mum you need to be especially selective with your generosity. You must be focused on creating win-win outcomes all the time. Win-lose does no good for anyone in the long run.
STEP 5: BE PROACTIVE ABOUT SETTING UP WIN-WIN OPPORTUNITIES
Don’t be scared to start small. Could you offer to help out another solo parent at school and see if they're able to do the same for you? For example, my son is taking extra ballet classes at the moment, so his mum’s partner and I alternate taking them so we can get more work done.
NURTURE KEY RELATIONSHIPS
These are the ones that are adding the most energy and value to your life. Look after these and you’ll both be better off. Don't be complacent about people who are key partners in living your ideal life.
MY FINAL TAKEAWAY TIP:
To be able to give your best you have to be your best. Take time to be good to yourself. My favourite thing is to have date night with myself. A great movie, good wine and a meal I enjoy. When I was single I'd do this every Thursday night. When you know how to treat yourself, you lead the way to attracting others who will do the same.