Align with the stars
The third stage of soul evolution is what contemporary Daoist scholars call ‘cosmicisation’. This is finding your cosmic self and becoming cosmically aligned. I’ve talked about the cosmic self a lot so far but there is a literal aspect to this concept.
In Chinese medicine, we come from the stars and we are connected to the stars (each acupuncture point in your body aligns with a star). Doing a daily chi practice aligns your body with the stars, and following the chi-cycle lifestyle aligns your life with the stars. When you feel equally at home with the stars as with your daily life on earth, you’ll know you have achieved cosmicisation.
So, if you repeated a drug experience, you were chasing something mystical, spontaneous yet eternal – an experience of Dao. You were, in fact, all along, on a mystical quest, not just on drugs. Questing might sound like something from a fairytale, but the minute you become rational about your drug use and
Ihaven’t felt at home since becoming a refugee at the age of nine. I searched for years for a place I could call my own. Every time my family moved – which was every two to three years – I thought to myself, “maybe THIS place will be where I’ll finally arrive”. Unfortunately, it wasn’t so. When I became old enough to travel on my own, I boarded a plane with anticipation of finding a perfect city and country that would stir in me a sense of belonging and home. Although I thoroughly enjoyed travelling, I also felt disappointed, and the longing for ‘home’ still nagged at me.
My journey to find my home has been deeply healing, challenging, and at times exhilarating. Along the way, I met my soul friends, discovered my purpose, and found my spiritual teacher and a community that is closely linked to my soul’s calling. In addition to that, the intimacy with myself and within my relationships is continuing to deepen with time. Based on my own inner work, observations, and numerous courses I’ve engaged in, I have observed emerging themes that have blocked me, and others, from experiencing belonging. Here are some of them:
Often, when we feel shame we have a tendency to hide our authentic self from others. This creates two layers of identity within us. Typically, we then communicate with others from the top layer, losing access to the deeper layer which, when tapped into, can allow genuine connection to emerge.
This feeling could become part of an identity as early as birth. For example, if you felt rejected by your mum or dad, this feeling could have started straight away. Or, if you moved around the world or grew up in different countries, it’s highly likely that you didn’t feel like you were a part of any particular culture. If you feel rejected, you might have a hard time creating relationships and friendships in which you feel secure, held and loved.
Lack of attunement
If, as you were growing up, nobody around you mirrored your feelings, needs, and desires back to you, then you might feel lost in the sea of your inner experiences. Lack of attunement can also lead to a sense of disconnectedness from yourself as well as people around you.