>Smart home li ving
The full horror of relocating gadgets
Anyone who has lived with young children knows The Secret Place. It’s that cherished area in your home that, given the chance, one parent will escape to while the other wrangles the kid into bed or the bath or, on really desperate days, the car to grandma’s house. The Secret Place has an old couch, a TV or laptop, and a ready supply of sugar-laden snacks that otherwise only appear in your child’s wildest dreams.
Our Secret Place was in the corner of our attic, and proved the perfect hideout for me and my husband to take turns in. “Where’s Daddy? Um… well he certainly isn’t upstairs watching
Game of Thrones and gorging on gluten-free brownies, that’s for darn sure.”
But now our kid is two and can easily outwit us, the joy of The Secret Place is over. I conceded defeat last week and decided to move the TV into our bedroom – if we all have to watch Elmo, at least we can watch him in bed. In a not-weird way, of course.
Ha. Hahaha. Moving the TV set was the easy part. But while I had factored in connecting up our Apple TV and the Fire TV stick, I’d forgotten we need a cable for free-to-air TV and, catastrophically, that all three are controlled by a Logitech Harmony smart remote, which has charging station requirements and a mystery black box of its very own.
“Watch, mama? Watch TV in bed?” My kid was literally leaping with excitement as I scoured the walls for power outlets when I got a text from my husband: “INTERNAL SPEAKERS MUTED, YOU NEED TO CONNECT THE EXTERNALS.”
I was done. Even if I got everything connected, I’d never figure out the smart remote setup. I turned to my daughter.
“Shall we read a book instead, honey?” Her lower lip trembled. Her face darkened. And there was nowhere to hide.