Weekly sticker

McIvor Times - - RABBIT STEW - China. in Asia. Seen some­where 50 years ago The McIvor Times, Fe­bru­ary 22, 1966 100 years ago The McIvor Times & Rod­ney Ad­ver­tiser, Fe­bru­ary 24, 1916 — Frank Ocean

My wal­let is like an onion, when I open it, it makes me cry.

Did you know?

In the Amer­i­can state of Ver­mont, women must have writ­ten per­mis­sion from their hus­band to wear false teeth.

Brain­teaser

Where can you find roads but no cars, forests but no trees and cities but no houses?

Funny signs

Seen out­side a school in Mary­land, US: “Park­land Mag­net Middle School for Aero­space Tech­nol­ogy, 4610 West Frank­fort Drive. An­nual Horse Ma­nure Sale Call school for de­tails.”

Seen at Browns Bar in Coven­try, UK: “Fire Exit. Mined the Step.”

On the menu

Strange menu trans­la­tions: “Leeks fried stupid egg,” Seen in

“The French Vanilla burns Yang Ba,” Seen some­where in Asia.

“Iron saucepan un­wea­ried ef­fort how­ever squid,” com­pe­ti­tion at Powneys Newsagency, Bendigo, dur­ing the hol­i­days … Just be­fore school went back she was rung with the news that she had won a prize

Heathcote Bowl­ing Club Ladies held their an­nual Ladies Char­ity Day last Wed­nes­day, and this year the char­ity to ben­e­fit is the Peter McCal­lum Can­cer In­sti­tute. The even­tual win­ners of the mixed com­pe­ti­tion were Doug Kennedy (s), Henry Mor­com, Phyl­lis New­ton and Mar­garet Richie.

At the Fe­bru­ary meet­ing of the McIvor Coun­cil, fur­ther ref­er­ences were made to the ef­forts be­ing made to get of­fi­cial sanc­tion for the es­tab­lish­ment of a sleeper de­pot at Heathcote if the goods rail ser­vice is later with­drawn

Mr D W (Pat) Hagan, who has given many years of ser­vice to the Toob­o­rac Foot­ball Club as a player and ad­min­is­tra­tor, has been elected head of the club for the 1966 sea­son.

At the Fe­bru­ary meet­ing of the McIvor Shire Coun­cil, ref­er­ences were made to a re­cent com­plaint that lo­cal trav­el­ers were un­able to get on the road ser­vice that caters for Heathcote, and it was re­ported that the mat­ter had been sat­is­fac­to­rily set­tled … Of 11 pas­sen­gers on the morn­ing of the com­plaint, nine were re­turn­ing trav­el­ers who had not booked. “Had they booked their seats, as they were sup­posed to do, a se­cond bus would have been brought into ser­vice,” the Shire Sec­re­tary (Mr D Maxwell) said…

We would re­mind cer­tain folk that it is ab­so­lutely use­less call­ing at this of­fice com­plain­ing of their names be­ing pub­lished in con­nec­tion with po­lice court cases. At the same time they may as well make a men­tal note of the fact that it is also use­less to com­plain of the style in which th­ese re­ports are writ­ten up, as our scribe just adopts what­ever method pleases him. If th­ese peo­ple do not wish pub­lic­ity given to their names and do­ings then let them keep out of court.

An­other one of our lo­cal sol­diers, Pri­vate A. Hock­ing, who was wounded while on ac­tive ser­vice, re­turned home on Tues­day by the mid-day train. He looked well, de­spite the fact that he is suf­fer­ing from an in­jury to his right leg. The sta­tion plat­form was dec­o­rated with flags and green­ery in hon­our of the oc­ca­sion. The Rev. W. M. Madg­wick greeted the re­turned hero into our midst again, in the first place as a mem­ber of his con­gre­ga­tion, and then on be­half of the cit­i­zens of Heathcote. He said that al­though Pte. Hock­ing had not been to the ac­tual front, he had ren­dered yeo­man ser­vice where he had been, and was there­fore en­ti­tled to ev­ery com­fort which we could give him and his fam­ily while they re­side here … Three cheers were then given for the re­turned sol­dier, and one for the Al­lies. Many ex­pres­sions of dis­gust were heard at the ab­sence of our lead­ing cit­i­zens upon this oc­ca­sion, and the opin­ion was freely ex­pressed that it was not very pa­tri­otic of them.

Odd spot

We may envy Queens­land’s year-round warm weather, par­tic­u­larly as we shiver our way through win­ter, but there’s one thing Queens­lan­ders can keep all for them­selves, pythons. Ac­cord­ing to Sun­shine Coast Snake Catchers 24/7, a stag­ger­ing one in three homes in south-east Queens­land has a snake liv­ing in its roof! And while most are fairly harm­less, one cou­ple liv­ing in Ma­roochy River came close to los­ing their home re­cently to fire af­ter a mas­sive python de­cided to take up res­i­dence in­side one of the walls of their home. The prob­lem was the gi­ant slip­pery free­loader had perched it­self di­rectly be­hind a power point, and right up against the wiring. Had the snake not sus­tained a se­ri­ous elec­tri­cal burn that caused smoke to pass through the empty power sock­ets, the snake may not have been found be­fore it caused a power surge that would most likely have cost the cou­ple their home. The python is re­cov­er­ing at Aus­tralia Zoo.

Have a laugh

There was a mas­sive ex­plo­sion at the lo­cal gun­pow­der fac­tory. Once all the mess had been cleared up, the in­quiry be­gan. One of the few sur­vivors was called up to make a state­ment. “Okay Simp­son,” the in­ves­ti­ga­tor said. “You were near the scene. What hap­pened?” “Well, it’s like this. Old Char­lie Hig­gins was in the mix­ing room and I saw him take a cig­a­rette out of his pocket and light up.” “He was smok­ing in the mix­ing room?” the in­ves­ti­ga­tor said in stunned hor­ror. “How long had he been with the com­pany?” “About 20 years, sir.” “Twenty years in the com­pany, then he goes and strikes a match in the mix­ing room. I’d have thought it would have been the last thing he’d have done.” “It was, sir.”

Weekly quote

‘‘When you’re happy, you en­joy the mu­sic. But when you’re sad, you un­der­stand the lyrics.”

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