Clients from hell

Ex­clu­sively for net: The lat­est in a se­ries of anony­mous ac­counts of night­mare clients

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The lat­est in our se­ries of night­mare clients

The fol­low­ing all hap­pened in per­son, as I worked on the client’s web­site at his of­fice:

Client: This text doesn’t look cen­tred in­side this box. Could you cen­tre it? Me: It’s al­ready cen­tred via CSS.

Client: I don’t think so. Could you move it a mil­lime­tre to the left? Me: OK but it won’t be cen­tred.

Client: No, it will be cen­tred. I moved the text a mil­lime­tre to the left.

Client: Hmm, this still doesn’t look cen­tred. How hard can it be to cen­tre it?

Me: As you said, I moved it a mil­lime­tre to the left. It was cen­tred be­fore.

Client: No, it wasn’t cen­tred, let me get a ruler. The client grabbed one and then mea­sured the gap on both sides of the text. But on one he used the end of the ruler as the start­ing point and on the other, he used the first line.

Client: See, one side says 4mm and the other says 5mm.

Me: Hmm, could you mea­sure that again? But start at the line for both sides.

Client: No, it doesn’t mat­ter. It’s not cen­tred. The client mea­sured it again, ex­actly the same way he did be­fore. Me: You’re us­ing the ruler wrong.

Client: No, I am not. I’m right. I’m al­ways right. He was laugh­ing but I don’t think he was jok­ing. At this point, we took turns us­ing the ruler, ar­gu­ing about the mea­sure­ments. I showed him it was cen­tred (it was) and he’d mea­sure it im­prop­erly and ar­gue it wasn’t (it was). Me: We could keep ar­gu­ing but I can’t do this.

Client: You’re right. You can’t do this. I think it’s time we part ways.

Later that day I got a lengthy email fir­ing me and telling me how I need to re­spect him as the boss. A few days later, I re­ceived an email from the client ask­ing if I was get­ting any work done on the site.

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