■ Just named my dog Tenmiles, so now I can say I walk ten miles every day.
■ The other day my girlfriend told me to take the spider out instead of killing it ... so we went out and had some drinks. He’s a cool guy, wants to become a web developer.
■ Fell asleep with my iPhone under my pillow last night and when I woke up it was gone and replaced with a shiny new fifty cent piece. Damn that Blue-Tooth Fairy.
■ One more sleep till Christmas if you’re an insomniac.
■ Got some extra sensitive toothpaste the other day. It gets really jealous if I use other toothpastes.