1New Norks

Picture (Australia) - - New Tits -

YOU’RE look­ing at the best tits in Bri­tain. And it’s been proven sci­en­tif­i­cally.

We shit you not. Lead­ing Pommy plas­tic sur­geon Dr Pa­trick Mal­lucci has de­clared that the all-nat­u­ral norks of model Holly Peers are in­deed PEER­LESS.

Top notch. Un­matched. FINEST BOOBAGE IN THE LAND.

Beautly, the 29-year-old hot­tie from Manch­ester is tak­ing the el­e­va­tion of her tits to their cur­rent God-like sta­tus firmly in her stride.

She’s not let­ting them go to her head, which is good ’cos that would just look weird.

“I look at so many other girls with lovely boobs and think ‘they’re much bet­ter than mine’,” she says mod­estly.

And she says that hav­ing fan­tas­tic F-cup FANDANGOS like hers can have draw­backs.

“I don’t ex­er­cise that much be­cause of my boobs,” she ad­mits sadly. Ah well. Ya win some, ya lose some. But back to Dr Mal­lucci, who has made tits his life’s work.

In 2011, he un­der­took a sur­vey of 100 nat­u­rally-norked top­less mod­els to work out what made them suc­cess­ful. A tough job, but some­one had to do it.

After much blood, sweat and prob­a­bly quite a bit of SPOOF, he had it sussed.

The per­fect tit has 45 per cent of its vol­ume is above the nip­ple; the nip­ple points up­wards at an av­er­age an­gle of 20 de­grees; the up­per half is either straight or con­cave, and the lower half has a neat, full curve.

Ap­par­ently Holly’s humdingers ful­fil all the re­quire­ments. But what’s her se­cret to maintaining her #1 sta­tus?

“Cook­ies,” she says. “Whack in some chocolate chips and I’m yours for­ever.”

We’ll get bak­ing right away.

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