Snakes go berserk on the booze
RATBAG reptiles in Oz, including some of our finest MAN-KILLING JOE BLAKES, are getting on the grog in unprecedented numbers.
Just the other day in the Northern Territory near Ali Curung – you know, between Wilora and Tennant Creek – this mulga snake was found with its head stuck in a can of VB, with no thought of the damage it was doing to its LIVER.
Local police officer Charles Pollard was called to the scene and later gave his appraisal of the delicate situation.
“He was alive and pretty aggro,” he said, summing up the situation.
Hmm. Sounds familiar. Coulda been us after knock-off last Friday.
But unfortunately it’s not an isolated incident, with snakes all over the country getting trapped by their boozy habits (see TRAGIC inset pic).
For some reason, sticking their slithery scones into a VB can seems to be a standard party trick for snakes, and it’s not a good look.
So if you know a snake that’s been hitting it a bit hard lately, have a quiet word before it gets itself trapped in a tinny and BOOZE-SHAMED in the pages of Australia’s most RESPONSIBLE mag.
THINK I’LL SWITCH TO GOON R BOY! ADDE