UP THERE, CAZALY!

Peo­ple ac­ci­den­tally fall arse-first onto the weird­est things!

Picture (Australia) - - News Flash -

IF A mate were to tell you, “Aw, maaaaate, last night I was ac­ci­den­tally pranc­ing around in my wife’s panties when I fell over and the well­lubed dildo I was ac­ci­den­tally hold­ing ac­ci­den­tally went up my arse” you’d tell him to FUCK OFF ’cos he’d be ly­ing. So why should we be­lieve these cunts? Ev­ery one of ’em fronted up to a hospi­tal emer­gency de­part­ment some­where in the world – walk­ing a bit funny, prob­a­bly – and asked if some­one could CHECK THEIR FRECKLE for in­va­sive ob­jects, which ap­par­ently they just hap­pened to FALL ON…

Sounds like a SCAM to us. Dunno how, dunno why, just does.

BEER BOT­TLE! COF­FEE JAR! KNIFE! PINT GLASS!

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