Re­ject the parmi chip plebiscite

Pilbara News - - Opinion - Tom Zaun­mayr

Chicken coup

Last week, The West Australian’s In­side Cover edi­tor Ben O’Shea went rogue af­ter once again stand­ing up for the out­dated view that stack­ing parmi­gianas on top of chips is OK, for­get­ting that chips have rights too.

For too long, po­tato has been op­pressed un­der the soggy regime of meat, but when John “Burgo” Burgess stood up for the #stopthes­tack cam­paign on air last week, O’Shea dis­missed him and sided with Lisa Fernandez.

This was de­spite Fernandez ad­mit­ting to com­mit­ting crimes against food, telling view­ers she mashed her chips in with her parmi.

O’Shea also called for a postal plebiscite on the mat­ter, but we be­lieve this can and should be re­solved with a free vote in Par­lia­ment.

Fish soup

What do you do when your chest freezer full of bait and food is ac­ci­den­tally turned off for a week? The Pil­bara News re­cently fell vic­tim to such a tragedy.

The ob­vi­ous an­swer is to turn it back on, put card­board over the frozen bait soup at the bot­tom of the freezer and pre­tend ev­ery­thing is OK.

But we con­ducted re­search into how to re­move the soup and the smell, which, let’s be honest, could out­last reli­gion.

To do this you need a whole bot­tle of Det­tol, what­ever mould-bust­ing spray you swear by, tow­els, two rolls of clean­ing wipes, two boxes of bi-carb of soda, a roll of bin bags, and a strong stom­ach.

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