He Is The Wal­rus

SFX - - Dvd & blu- ray -

Re­lease Date: 8 June

2014 | 15 | Blu- ray/ DVD/ Down­load Direc­tor: Kevin Smith Cast: Michael Parks, Justin Long, Ha­ley Joel Os­ment, Ge­n­e­sis Ro­driguez, Johnny Depp, Ralph Gar­man

Not too long

ago, Kevin Smith and Scott Mosier heard an apoc­ryphal story about a man who wanted a lodger to dress up as a wal­rus. They im­pro­vised a film syn­op­sis on their “SMod­cast” and asked if lis­ten­ers wanted to see it. They did...

Pod­caster Wal­lace ( Justin Long) trav­els to Canada chas­ing a story, but ends up im­pris­oned by for­mer sea­man Howard Howe ( Michael Parks). Howe drugs Wal­lace, mu­ti­lates him and stitches him into a wal­rus suit. Yep.

A sort of dadaist spin on The Hu­man Cen­tipede, Tusk is let down by mud­dled ex­e­cu­tion and dis­like­able char­ac­ters. In Wal­lace’s case, that’s de­lib­er­ate, but Ally ( Ge­n­e­sis Ro­driguez) and best pal Teddy ( Ha­ley Joel Os­ment) are just bor­ing. Then there’s Johnny Depp... His per­for­mance as La­pointe – an un­funny French- Canadian man­hunter – is a low, even in his now wildly off- track ca­reer. A scene where he talks about his bow­els seems to last for days.

Michael Parks is good value and the suit is au­then­ti­cally hor­ri­ble, but you can’t help think­ing that the idea of Tusk is bet­ter than the ac­tu­al­ity.

“20 Years To Tusk” ( 24 min­utes) finds Smith talk­ing can­didly about his ca­reer, while a 14- part Mak­ing Of ( 51 min­utes) goes be­hind the scenes. The orig­i­nal pod­cast is in­cluded ( 30 min­utes), as well as direc­tor’s com­men­tary, two deleted scenes with Smith in­tros, and an an­i­mated clip. Will Salmon La­pointe is, in­ex­pli­ca­bly, get­ting his own spin- off movie – Yoga Hosers will see him help two teens battle an army of mon­sters.

“Where is my lat­est coal de­liv­ery?!”

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