Big Trou­ble In Litt le China

Jack Bur­ton re­turns in the Rock- star­ring re­make of John Car­pen­ter’s cult clas­sic movie

SFX: The Sci-Fi and Fantasy Magazine - - First Contact - Il­lus­tra­tion by Paul Garner

Lis­ten up Dwayne, our read­ers have some ideas for your ad­ven­tures in Lit­tle China

Make Gra­cie The Hero

1 Jack Bur­ton’s uniquely in­ept brand of hero­ics is what makes him such a great char­ac­ter. Torsten Scheib doesn’t want to see that change in the se­quel. “I’d love to see [ Dwayne John­son] be­ing a loser. That’s what Rus­sell was in the orig­i­nal, that’s what made the movie so funny. Why not give it a boost and turn the sup­port­ing ac­tress into the lead? Mar­got Rob­bie would make a kick- ass mod­ernised ver­sion of Gra­cie Law.”

Bring Back Kurt Rus­sell

2 Fab The Rock may be, but he’s no Jack Bur­ton ac­cord­ing to Gary Mancini: “Kurt Rus­sell as Jack Bur­ton. Old, cranky, but still de­lud­ing him­self as the hero he be­lieves him­self to be. The Rock can be his new side­kick, but only Kurt can play Jack Bur­ton.”

Do Some­thing New

3 Shock­ingly, not ev­ery­one likes BTILC. Case in point: Andy P Meakin, who wants to see a new take on the sub­ject. “As some­one who can’t un­der­stand the peo­ple who re­fer to the orig­i­nal as a ‘ clas­sic’, I’m just hop­ing for some light en­ter­tain­ment with­out any at­tempts to make it feel like the ’ 80s film. Do some­thing new with the idea.”

Nods To Hong Kong Cin­ema

4 “BTILC was a way of port­ing Hong Kong ac­tion cin­ema over to the Western world; let’s have scads of sub­tle homages to those orig­i­nals with a com­i­cal twist!” says Nick Eff­in­g­ham. “Have Wang de­stroy the dice while gam­ing ( à la God of Gam­blers) only to be told that the re­sult doesn’t count. Have them kick an un­dead char­ac­ter in the leg and have them hop for a scene...”

Don’t Do It

5 Your big­gest wish by far was, er, for the re­make not to hap­pen at all. “Tell me that some­how I’ve been warped into a night­mar­ish re­al­ity where re­makes are the Big Thing! So I can yell GET ME OUT OF THIS PLACE !” says Gary A Valen­zuela.

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