Penny Dread­ful

Donuts, Cron-nuts and a re­boot I’m on board with

SFX - - Opinion -


They’re re­boot­ing Hal­loween and I’m not even al­lowed to be an­gry about it. John Car­pen­ter, cult hor­ror hero and di­rec­tor of the orig­i­nal, is at­tached and he’s teamed up with my favourite mod­ern hor­ror pro­ducer Jason Blum to make a tenth Hal­loween movie, due in 2017. The bas­tards. Car­pen­ter, who’ll exec pro­duce, has talked be­fore about how fo­cus­ing too much on Michael My­ers’ mo­ti­va­tion and con­nec­tion to the vic­tims made the se­quels less scary. I couldn’t agree more – the orig­i­nal face­less, mo­tive­less un­stop­pable killer lurk­ing among the clean wash­ing and white picket fences was a clear mes­sage to suburbia: no one is safe. So now when he says, “I’m go­ing to help to try to make the 10th se­quel the scari­est of them all,” he only bloody might. Urgh.


The best thing I’ve seen in ages is a movie about a bloke who likes to dress up as a wolf called Peach­fuzz. Creep, which screened at FrightFest 2014 but is now on Net­flix, writ­ten by and star­ring Mark Du­plass and Pa­trick Brice, is a very weird, deeply un­set­tling bit of “Mum­ble­gore” that I couldn’t rec­om­mend more. It’s a hand-held two-han­der, where Brice plays a free­lance cam­era­man hired to make a video di­ary for a bloke who says he’s dy­ing of can­cer and wants to leave a record for his un­born child. It’s funny, fright­en­ingly awk­ward and has a dev­as­tat­ing end­ing. Plans are al­ready in the works for a sec­ond and third in­stal­ment and while I can’t imag­ine how this would play out, it’s a Jason Blum film, and the man knows how to build a fran­chise. Check it out – and watch for Peach­fuzz cos­tumes at Hal­loween.


The Winch­ester Mys­tery House is an in­cred­i­ble build­ing in San Jose, Cal­i­for­nia. It’s huge, has more than 100 rooms and comes with an amaz­ing back­story. And now it’s go­ing to be the ba­sis for a movie, star­ring He­len Mir­ren. Story time: Sarah Winch­ester was the heir to the for­tune gen­er­ated though the pro­duc­tion of Winch­ester shot­guns. When her fa­ther-in-law and hus­band died in quick suc­ces­sion she sud­denly in­her­ited mil­lions but was con­sumed with grief. The tale goes that she vis­ited a medium who sug­gested she was cursed by the peo­ple killed by Winch­ester guns – the only way to break the curse was to be­gin build­ing work on a house and to never stop. So she bought a big piece of a land and em­ployed builders to go to work based on her own plans. They didn’t stop for 38 years. As a re­sult the house is nuts – full of stair­cases which go nowhere, doors open­ing onto sheer drops, se­cret rooms with tricks, codes and puz­zles built into the ar­chi­tec­ture. I’ve seen it and it’s amaz­ing. The Spierig broth­ers (Pre­des­ti­na­tion, Day­break­ers) are at­tached to di­rect and it’s not clear yet what the ac­tual story will be, but the myth is rich. Here’s hop­ing for 13 Ghosts meets Grand De­signs via Bowl­ing For Columbine.


Vet­eran Brit di­rec­tor Ken Loach might have bagged the top prize at the glam­orous Cannes Film Fes­ti­val this year, but what about At­tack Of The Killer Donuts? Premier­ing at the Cannes Marché (the mar­ket place, where films come to be bought and sold) AOTKD is a B-movie throw­back in which a botched ex­per­i­ment trans­forms be­nign Krispy Kremes into mur­der­ous munchies bent on de­stroy­ing donut shop work­ers and cof­fee-crammed cops alike. Have a fa­mil­iar ring to it? Don’t let your eyes glaze over. Bizarrely, re­views sug­gest it’s not ac­tu­ally that bad. Ac­cord­ing to The Hol­ly­wood Re­porter it doesn’t quite sat­isfy like At­tack Of The Killer Toma­toes but is way tastier than The At­tack Of The Gi­ant Mous­saka...

The Hal­loween fella is com­ing home again… You will be scared by Creep. Hon­est.

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