12 MON­KEYS

Ty­ing time in knots…

SFX: The Sci-Fi and Fantasy Magazine - - Viewscreen -

UK Broad­cast Syfy, fin­ished US Broad­cast Syfy, fin­ished Episodes Re­viewed 2.01-2.11

VOICEOVER Pre­vi­ously on 12 Mon­keys… it was a bit like the film but not much. It was more like Con­tin­uum with­out the cool suit, or The Ter­mi­na­tor with a plague in­stead of a techno-apoc­a­lypse. Lots of stuff hap­pened that’ll make no sense con­densed into a “pre­vi­ously on” seg­ment, so all you re­ally need to know is sci­en­tists in a bleak fu­ture keep send­ing James Cole back into the past to try to pre­vent a plague but he keeps mak­ing a pig’s ear of it. And there are some bad­dies cre­at­ing an al­ter­nate fu­ture where forests are red. A mad girl in the past called Jen­nifer wants to be Har­ley Quinn but turns into He­lena Bon­ham Carter in the fu­ture. And every­body ar­gues. Con­tin­u­ally.

COLE I’m stuck in the past.

CASSIE I’m stuck in the fu­ture.

COLE I got it worse.

CASSIE No. I got it worse. Hey, how come we’re ar­gu­ing even when we’re sep­a­rated by a cen­tury?

DR JONES Hang on, time’s changed and I sud­denly have a hus­band I never knew about. That’s awk­ward.

CASSIE While we’re wait­ing I’ll have a fling with the dodgy para­mil­i­tary guy guard­ing the base and go all badass like Sarah Con­nor…

DR JONES Psst… best not to draw too many par­al­lels.

Mean­while, in the past...

COLE Ramse, you may have be­trayed us all by sell­ing out to bad guys to save your son, but we’re still best buds, yeah?

RAMSE Yeah. No. Prob­a­bly. Let’s face it, we’ll all be swap­ping al­le­giances on a weekly ba­sis for the rest of the sea­son, so let’s just wrap up the plague plot quickly and get on with this sea­son’s arc.

JEN­NIFER I’m mad me! Turnip?

COLE No thanks. Plague?

JEN­NIFER Here you go. Can I help kill bad­dies now? The bad­dies carry on try­ing to cre­ate their red for­est. Cole bounces around in time with who­ever he’s ar­gu­ing with the least that week. There’s a re­ally dull bot­tle episode and a fan­tas­tic Ground­hog Day one. Al­le­giances shift weekly. There are sur­real druggy dream se­quences. The ma­chine breaks down reg­u­larly at dra­matic mo­ments.

DR JONES Oh my hus­band’s died, but now I seem to have a daugh­ter.

COLE Yeah, I saved her in the past and she been se­cretly brought up by He­lena Bon­ham Carter.

DR JONES Isn’t time travel won­der­ful?

Dr Jones van­ishes in a puff of time para­dox…

Dave Golder

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