THE A-Z OF RED DWARF

A guide to the supporting play­ers who pop­u­late the Red Dwarf uni­verse.

SFX: The Sci-Fi and Fantasy Magazine - - Welcome - WORDS Dave Golder

You know about Rim­mer, Lis­ter, Cat, Kry­ten, Holly and Kochan­ski. But over 10 se­ries, 61 episodes and 28 years, Red Dwarf has built a vast uni­verse – so huge, in fact, that we couldn’t fit all of the supporting play­ers here. Here’s a quick-ish guide to the key peo­ple, aliens and robots who’ve crossed paths with the boys from the Dwarf.

AABLE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BE­YOND A JOKE” (SE­RIES VII)

A Di­vaDroid In­ter­na­tional Se­ries 4000 Mechanoid; Kry­ten’s pro­duc­tion brother who be­came a slave to a Sim­u­lant Trader, who got him ad­dicted to a mechanoid nar­cotic called Outro­zone. He was never go­ing to iron a straight crease af­ter that.

ACKERMAN, MR FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BACK IN THE RED, PART III” (SE­RIES VIII)

Sadis­tic, one-eyed prison gover­nor

of Red Dwarf’s the Tank. Also in charge of the Ca­naries – vol­un­teer con­vict armies in the Space Corps, utilised for mis­sions deemed too dan­ger­ous for less ex­pend­able per­son­nel.

ANDY FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BACK TO RE­AL­ITY” (SE­RIES V)

Ir­ri­tat­ing tech guy work­ing at the To­tal Im­mer­sion Video Game ar­cade. Very Brum­mie.

APOC­A­LYPSE BOYS, THE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “GUN­MEN OF THE APOC­A­LYPSE” (SE­RIES VI)

Four griz­zly West­ern out­laws who were Kry­ten’s fan­tasy man­i­fes­ta­tion of the Ar­maged­don Virus: Brother Death, Brother War, Brother Famine and Brother Pesti­lence.

bBARTOKOVSKY, KATERINA FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BACK TO EARTH, PART I”

A holo­gram called into be­ing af­ter a gross act of neg­li­gence by Rim­mer. She was al­legedly based on the Dwarf’s science of­fi­cer, and she hated Rim­mer. Ac­tu­ally a hal­lu­ci­na­tory prod­uct of the sec­ond De­spair Squid.

BAX­TER FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “PETE, PART I” (SE­RIES VIII)

Large scary pris­oner in Red Dwarf’s the Tank who once proved how hard he was by bet­ting his tes­ti­cle in a card game.

BEGGS FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “EN­TAN­GLED” (SE­RIES X)

Bi­o­log­i­cally En­gi­neered Garbage Gob­blers, cre­ated to eat land­fills. Lis­ter lost Star­bug and Rim­mer to a BEGG chief in a game of poker. The BEGG fit­ted Lis­ter with a groinal ex­ploder to en­sure he handed over his win­nings.

BENNET, EL­IZ­A­BETH FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BE­YOND A JOKE” (SE­RIES VII)

A recre­ation of the Pride And Prej­u­dice char­ac­ter in the in­ter­ac­tive Jane Austen World. (See also Ben­nets Jane, Kitty, Ly­dia, Mary and Mrs.)

BIRDMAN FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “PETE, PART I” (SE­RIES VIII)

Crazy old pris­oner in the Hole who had a special friend­ship with his spar­row, Pete.

BLENKINSOP, OSWALD FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “CAS­SAN­DRA” (SE­RIES VIII)

A pris­oner in the Tank on Red Dwarf, and a mem­ber of the Ca­naries. Comes across as a per­pet­ual lager lout. Nick­named Kill Crazy, he was des­per­ate to kill some­one.

BRAN­NI­GAN FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “QUEEG” (SE­RIES II)

A psy­chi­a­trist on Red Dwarf whose per­son­al­ity was briefly down­loaded into Rim­mer. Ex­ec­u­tive of­fi­cer aboard Red Dwarf whose per­son­al­ity was briefly re­vived in the body of Lis­ter be­cause she had the au­thor­ity to stop the ship’s self-de­struct se­quence.

BUL­LET, JAKE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BACK TO RE­AL­ITY” (SE­RIES V)

Traf­fic cop al­ter ego of Kry­ten in an hal­lu­ci­na­tion cre­ated by the De­spair Squid.

cCAMILLE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “CAMILLE” (SE­RIES IV)

Perception-bend­ing plea­sure GELF who ap­pears to on­look­ers as the sex­ual part­ner they most de­sire. In re­al­ity, green and blobby.

CAR­MEN, CARO­LINE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “EPIDEME” (SE­RIES VII)

For­mer Red Dwarf crewmem­ber who was re­posted just be­fore the Red Dwarf ra­di­a­tion leak. She later con­tracted the zom­bie virus epideme which, mil­lions of years later, she spread to Lis­ter af­ter her frozen body was brought aboard Star­bug.

CAT PRIEST FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “WAITING FOR GOD” (SE­RIES I)

A blind fe­line priest of the Red Hat fac­tion left be­hind on Red Dwarf with Cat when all the other cats built their own arks and bug­gered off, leav­ing the ill and frail and use­less be­hind.

CHARLES, CRAIG FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BACK TO EARTH, PART III”

Soap star the Dwar­fers meet on 21st cen­tury Earth who looks un­can­nily like Lis­ter.

CHEN FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “THE END” (SE­RIES I)

One of Lis­ter, Petersen and Selby’s drink­ing bud­dies on Red Dwarf be­fore the ra­di­a­tion leak. Later recre­ated by Nanobots.

CON­FI­DENCE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “CON­FI­DENCE AND PARA­NOIA” (SE­RIES I)

A phys­i­cal man­i­fes­ta­tion of Lis­ter’s con­fi­dence; he looked like the man­ager of the Lon­don Jets and had the voice of quiz show host Bing Bax­ter.

CRANE, NIRVANAH FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “HOLOSHIP” (SE­RIES V)

Flight commander on the Holoship who looked like she was head­ing for a re­la­tion­ship with Rim­mer un­til she was cho­sen as the holo­gram switched off to ac­com­mo­date him.

CRAW­FORD FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “TROJAN” (SE­RIES X)

A psy­cho­pathic sim who killed ev­ery­one else on her ship, then used the ship’s holo­gram (based on Rim­mer’s brother Howard) to trick her way on board Red Dwarf.

CRE­ATOR, THE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BACK TO EARTH, PART III”

The man who cre­ated the Red

Dwarf tele­vi­sion show in the tele­vi­sion show.

DDENNIS “DUNGO” THE GAR­DENER FIRST MEN­TION “THE BE­GIN­NING” (SE­RIES X)

Rim­mer’s se­cret real fa­ther af­ter his pro­mis­cu­ous mother de­cided to go all DH Lawrence with the gar­dener.

DE­SPAIR SQUID FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BACK TO RE­AL­ITY” (SE­RIES V)

Huge oceanic crea­ture whose ink causes hal­lu­ci­na­tions that lead to suicide.

DIBBLEY, DUANE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BACK TO RE­AL­ITY” (SE­RIES V)

Buck-toothed, plas­tic-san­dal wear­ing ver­sion of Cat that was cre­ated in the De­spair Squidin­duced hal­lu­ci­na­tion.

DOG, THE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “PAR­AL­LEL UNI­VERSE” (SE­RIES II)

Cat’s slobby al­ter­nate self in a ma­tri­ar­chal al­ter­nate re­al­ity.

DOYLE, BILLY FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BACK TO RE­AL­ITY” (SE­RIES V)

Rim­mer’s De­spair Squid-in­duced al­ter ego – un­suc­cess­ful half­brother of...

DOYLE, SE­BAS­TIAN FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “BACK TO RE­AL­ITY” (SE­RIES V)

Iden­tity as­sumed by Lis­ter in the hal­lu­ci­na­tion caused by a De­spair Squid – a fas­cist leader re­spon­si­ble for the deaths of thou­sands of peo­ple.

EECH-ECH-ECH-ECH-ECH-ECH-ECH-ECH FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “EMOHAWK” (SE­RIES VI)

Best-look­ing daugh­ter of the chief of the the Kinita­wowi GELF (Ge­net­i­cally En­gi­neered Life Form) tribe, whom the chief wanted mar­ried off to Lis­ter. Well, they did share the same star sign – Aries.

EDGING­TON, IRENE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “EN­TAN­GLED” (SE­RIES X)

Lead sci­en­tist at the Er­ro­neous Rea­son­ing Re­search Academy [ERRA]. In­ven­tor of the groinal ex­ploder, whose ex­per­i­ments also de­volved her into a chim­panzee.

FFRANKEN­STEIN FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “THE END” (SE­RIES I)

Lis­ter’s cat, who sur­vived the ra­di­a­tion leak in Red Dwarf and be­came the pro­gen­i­tor of the su­per-evolved cat race on­board the ship.

GGAR­RETT, TALIA FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “ONLY THE GOOD…” (SE­RIES VIII)

A “friend” of Cap­tain Hol­lis­ter’s who sur­vives the de­struc­tion of the Her­mes, but her es­cape pod in­tro­duces a highly cor­ro­sive chameleonic mi­cro-or­gan­ism to Red Dwarf.

GREAT ONE, THE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “RIM­MER­WORLD” (SE­RIES VI)

King of Rim­mer­world, a planet of Rim­mer clones.

GRIM REAPER, THE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “ONLY THE GOOD…” (SE­RIES VIII)

Rim­mer kicked him in the balls when Red Dwarf was about to be de­stroyed… again. May have ac­tu­ally been a hal­lu­ci­na­tion caused by con­cus­sion. H

HOL­LIS­TER, CAP­TAIN FRANK FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “THE END” (SE­RIES I)

Long-suf­fer­ing, US-born com­mand­ing of­fi­cer of Red Dwarf at the time of the ra­di­a­tion leak that killed ev­ery­one on board except Lis­ter. Later res­ur­rected by Nanobots.

HAR­RI­SON FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “HOLOSHIP” (SE­RIES V)

Re­place­ment holo­gram for Rim­mer, when Rim­mer left to join the Holoship. Af­ter liv­ing with Cat, Lis­ter and Kry­ten for a while she asked to be switched off, say­ing she ap­pre­ci­ated death more now.

HIGHS, THE FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “DEMONS AND ANGELS” (SE­RIES V)

Al­ter­na­tive ver­sions of the Red Dwarf crew cre­ated by the trip­li­ca­tor who ex­em­plify all the best qual­i­ties of their orig­i­nals. More pleas­ant than the Lows.

HILLY FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “PAR­AL­LEL UNI­VERSE” (SE­RIES II)

Fe­male ver­sion of Holly in an al­ter­nate ma­tri­ar­chal re­al­ity – be­came the blue­print for Holly’s head sex change in sea­son three.

HOGEY THE ROGUEY FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “THE BE­GIN­NING” (SE­RIES X)

Eas­ily bored rogue droid and petty thief who’s plagued Red Dwarf on a num­ber of oc­ca­sions and liked to chal­lenge peo­ple to du­els across space and time.

HOLDEN, FRED “THICKIE” FIRST AP­PEAR­ANCE “TIMESLIDES” (SE­RIES III)

School­mate of Rim­mer’s at Io House who in­vented the Ten­sion Sheet. (Sort of… he over­heard fu­ture Rim­mer telling young Rim­mer to paint some bub­blewrap red and patent it.)

hudZen-10 First ap­pear­ance “the last day” (se­ries iii)

Up­grade mechanoid sent to Red Dwarf by Di­vaDroid In­ter­na­tional to re­place Kry­ten.

hec­tor First ap­pear­ance “camille” (se­ries IV)

Green, blobby boyfriend of Camille. i

in­quisi­tor, the First ap­pear­ance “the in­quisi­tor” (se­ries V)

Sim­u­lant who reached the end of time and dis­cov­ered there was in fact no god. Cre­ated the Time Gaunt­let and made it his duty to visit each and ev­ery per­son through­out time and space to judge whether they’re wor­thy of ex­is­tence.

JJe­sus of cae­sarea First ap­pear­ance “le­mons” (se­ries X)

A guy who the Dwar­fers mis­took for Je­sus of Nazareth while in In­dia in 23AD. k

kennedy, John fitzger­ald First ap­pear­ance “tikka to ride” (se­ries Vii)

35th pres­i­dent of the United States whom the Dwar­fers ac­ci­den­tally saved from as­sas­si­na­tion – that might sound like a good thing but it cocked up the time­line might­ily. l

lAn­strom, hilde­gard First ap­pear­ance “quar­an­tine” (se­ries V)

Space Corps sci­en­tist and holo­gram who con­tracted a holovirus that drove her in­sane.

le­gion First ap­pear­ance “le­gion” (se­ries Vi)

A syn­thetic life form that cre­ates a gestalt per­son­al­ity from those it is cur­rently in con­tact with. Also cre­ated the hard-light tech­nol­ogy that al­lowed Rim­mer to be­come a “solid” holo­gram.

len­non First Ap­pear­ance “fu­ture echoes” (se­ries i)

One of Lis­ter’s ro­bot gold­fishes, along with McCart­ney.

lis­ter, bex­ley First ap­pear­ance “fu­ture echoes” (se­ries i)

Along with Jim, one of the twin sons of Dave Lis­ter and Deb Lis­ter. (In an al­ter­nate uni­verse they’re the twin sons of Kris­tine Kochan­ski and Span­ners.)

lis­ter, deb First ap­pear­ance “par­al­lel uni­verse” (se­ries ii)

Fe­male ver­sion of Lis­ter in a ma­tri­ar­chal al­ter­na­tive uni­verse. “Fa­ther” of Jim and Bex­ley Lis­ter. m

mcin­tyre, ge­orge First ap­pear­ance “the end” (se­ries i)

Flight co-or­di­na­tor on Red Dwarf who died shortly be­fore the dis­as­trous ra­di­a­tion leak and be­came the ship’s holo­gram. Ter­ri­ble at speeches but well liked.

mc­gruder, Yvonne First ap­pear­ance “Bet­ter than life” (se­ries ii)

Red Dwarf fe­male box­ing cham­pion who was Rim­mer’s only

sex­ual en­counter (and even then, only once) in his life be­fore holo-ex­is­tence. The whole ex­pe­ri­ence lasted 12 min­utes in­clud­ing the time taken to eat the pizza af­ter­wards.

Mamet, pro­fes­sor First ap­pear­ance “psirens” (Se­ries Vi)

Di­vadroid en­gi­neer who cre­ated the 4000 range as a par­ody of John War­bur­ton, the fi­ancé who jilted her be­fore her wed­ding. Ap­peared as a Psiren­cre­ated hal­lu­ci­na­tion.

mel­lie First Ap­pear­ance “Di­men­sion Jump” (Se­ries Iv)

Sec­re­tary to Ad­mi­ral Sir James “Bongo” Tran­ter in Ace Rim­mer’s orig­i­nal di­men­sion. Of­fered to smear her­self in maple syrup for Ace. Looks like Holly. Rim­mer’s pen­guin hench-pup­pet when he con­tracts a holo-virus and turns evil.

mul­hol­land-jjones, Sab­rina First ap­pear­ance “timeSlideS” (Se­ries iii)

Model, best­selling nov­el­ist and in­ter­na­tional jet­set­ter. Lis­ter’s wife in the re­al­ity where he in­vented the Ten­sion Sheet and be­came very rich.

mut­ton Vin­daloo Beast First ap­pear­ance “Dna” (Se­ries IV)

Crea­ture cre­ated by a DNA ma­chine and a curry. De­feated by lager. n

new­ton, dr Karen First ap­pear­ance “Back in the red, part i” (Se­ries Viii)

Chief med­i­cal of­fi­cer on Red Dwarf at the time of the ra­di­a­tion leak, and then when the nanobots recre­ated it. Once slept with Rim­mer but it wasn’t her fault (he was us­ing a sex virus at the time).

NODDY First Ap­pear­ance “Back to Earth, PART ii”

Sci-fi shop owner and geek on 21st cen­tury Earth who be­lieves the Dwar­fers when they say they’re from the fu­ture. o

Oswald, lee har­vey First ap­pear­ance “Tikka to ride” (Se­ries Vii)

Would-be assassin of John F Kennedy un­til the Dwar­fers blun­der in and ruin his aim. p

Padre First ap­pear­ance “Di­men­sion jump” (se­ries IV)

A chap­lain at the Mi­mas test base in Ace Rim­mer’s ori­gin uni­verse, who looks re­mark­ably like the Cat.

Para­noia First ap­pear­ance “con­fi­dence And para­noia” (se­ries i)

Phys­i­cal man­i­fes­ta­tion of Lis­ter’s para­noia.

pete First ap­pear­ance “Pete, part i” (se­ries Viii)

A spar­row who died and be­came a T-Rex. Then re­cov­ered.

petersen, olaf First ap­pear­ance “the end” (se­ries i)

Dan­ish ca­ter­ing of­fi­cer on Red Dwarf and one of Dave Lis­ter’s best drink­ing bud­dies.

pla­tini, her­cule First ap­pear­ance “holoShiP” (se­ries V)

Cap­tain of the Holoship.

pree First ap­pear­ance “fathers And suns” (Se­ries X)

A re­place­ment com­puter in­ter­face for Red Dwarf. She came with a “pre­dic­tive” fa­cil­ity; Pree could carry out your or­ders be­fore you’d given them. q

Queeg First ap­pear­ance “Queeg” (Se­ries ii)

Al­legedly Red Dwarf’s scary, au­thor­i­tar­ian back-up com­puter, but ac­tu­ally a jape dreamt up by Holly to teach his un­grate­ful crew a les­son. r

Rachel First ap­pear­ance “timeSlideS” (SE­RIES iii)

Rim­mer’s blow-up doll – she later ap­pears in “Stoke Me A Clip­per” at Rim­mer’s fu­neral.

rim­mer, Ace First ap­pear­ance “Di­men­sion Jump” (Se­ries IV)

What a guy. Multi-uni­ver­sally loved heroic ver­sion of Arnold J Rim­mer from an al­ter­nate re­al­ity. May have liked kip­pers.

Ar­lene rim­mer First Ap­pear­ance “Par­al­lel Uni­verse” (Se­ries ii)

Fe­male ver­sion of Rim­mer in the par­al­lel uni­verse where the sexes are swapped.

rim­mer, Frank First Ap­pear­ance “Poly­morph” (Se­ries iii)

One of Rim­mer’s three broth­ers. Joined Space Corps. Even­tu­ally be­came a holo­gram. His dark se­cret is… he never rose higher than a vend­ing ma­chine re­pair man. s

Selby First Ap­pear­ance “the end” (Se­ries i)

One of Lis­ter, Olaf Petersen and Chen’s drink­ing bud­dies on Red Dwarf be­fore the ra­di­a­tion leak. Later recre­ated by Nanobots.

skut­ters First Ap­pear­ance “the end” (Se­ries i)

Claw-headed ser­vice droids on Red Dwarf. The Dwar­fers have given them var­i­ous nick­names over time; Bob and Madge, Stab­bim, El Skutto, Pinky and Perky among them. When Rim­mer was still in­tan­gi­ble he taught them to play the Ham­mond or­gan.

Snack dis­pensers 23 And 34 First ap­pear­ance “Dear Dave” (Se­ries X)

Two AI vend­ing ma­chines who be­come in­volved in a love tri­an­gle with Lis­ter.

Span­ners First Ap­pear­ance “Di­men­sion Jump” (Se­ries Iv)

Ace-uni­verse ver­sion of Dave Lis­ter; he’s a suc­cess­ful en­gi­neer and mar­ried to console of­fi­cer Kris­tine Kochan­ski.

Smeg And the Heads First Ap­pear­ance “timeSlideS” (Se­ries iii)

Lis­ter’s teenage band, best known for “The Om Song”.

speed, Jim Bex­ley First Ap­pear­ance “fu­ture echoes” (Se­ries i)

Lis­ter’s favourite Zero Grav­ity Foot­baller, Speed played for the Lon­don Jets. Lis­ter named his twin sons af­ter him.

stupid, clois­ter the First ap­pear­ance “Waiting for God” (Se­ries i)

The cats’ god, who was frozen in time. Lis­ter is con­vinced it’s him; Cat’s not so sure when Lis­ter fails to turn his food into a woman.

Swal­low First Ap­pear­ance “Back to Earth, Part ii”

A prop maker who worked on Red Dwarf who stole many of the props af­ter the show ended and sold them on eBay. He helps the Dwar­fers find the Cre­ator. t

Talkie Toaster First Ap­pear­ance “fu­ture Echoes” (Se­ries i)

AI toaster who ir­ri­tates ev­ery­one by con­stantly of­fer­ing them hot, but­tered, bread-based con­sum­ables. His motto is, “I toast there­fore I am.”

tod­hunter, Frank First Ap­pear­ance “the end” (Se­ries i)

Sec­ond in com­mand on Red Dwarf, and the man who puts Lis­ter in Sta­sis.

Tran­ter, ad­mi­ral sir James “bongo” First ap­pear­ance “Di­men­sion Jump” (Se­ries Iv)

Ace Rim­mer’s boss in the orig­i­nal Ace-di­men­sion. Over­saw Project: Wild­fire at the Mi­mas test base. Would have but­tered his bread on the other side if Ace had asked. u

Un­speak­able one, the First Ap­pear­ance “ter­ror­form” (Se­ries V)

A man­i­fes­ta­tion of Rim­mer’s self-loathing cre­ated by the Psi-Moon. v

voorhese, Cap­tain Haupt­mann Mein­hard First Ap­pear­ance “Stoke me A Clip­per” (Se­ries Vii)

Arch neme­sis of Ace Rim­mer. A Nazi of­fi­cer on a par­al­lel uni­verse Earth, he mur­dered his own fam­ily, wore a mon­o­cle and had a pet croc­o­dile that went by the name of Snappy. w

War­bur­ton, John First Ap­pear­ance “Be­yond A Joke” (Se­ries Vii)

Bio-en­gi­neer for Di­vaDroid In­ter­na­tional; a real buf­foon of a man who was pompous, fool­ish and quick to anger. His disgruntled fi­ancée, Pro­fes­sor Mamet, de­signed the 4000 se­ries to be a par­ody of him.

Wed­nes­day, Chan­cel­lor First Ap­pear­ance “the Be­gin­ning” (Se­ries X)

Chan­cel­lor of the Sim­u­lant Gen­er­als; an­swer­able to Dom­i­na­tor Zlurth. Once evis­cer­ated him­self af­ter a mis­un­der­stand­ing with his boss, but re­cov­ered.

YYAtes, Lisa First Ap­pear­ance “Thanks for the mem­ory” (SE­RIES ii)

An old flame of Lis­ter’s from his Liverpool days. They had an in­tense and pas­sion­ate af­fair, the mem­ory of which Lis­ter “shared” with Rim­mer.

ZZlurth, Dom­i­na­tor First Ap­pear­ance “the Be­gin­ning” (Se­ries X)

Leader of the Sim­u­lant Gen­er­als, who re­gards the other gen­er­als as toad­y­ing yes men who de­serve his con­tempt. Main am­bi­tion in life to kill the last hu­man, Lis­ter.

Kry­ten goes on a date with the real Camille.

Smoke him a kip­per, he’ll be back for break­fast.

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