Cen­tre­link’s house of cards is a place cer­tain to drive you in­sane

Sunday Herald Sun - - Opinion - KATIE BICE

DE­SPITE our best ef­forts, oc­ca­sion­ally we are forced to deal with gov­ern­ment de­part­ments.

My mis­sion seemed sim­ple enough. Get all fam­ily mem­bers on the same Medi­care card.

Af­ter 10 years of mar­riage and de­spite re­peated re­quests, the bet­ter half had al­ways cho­sen to keep a mon­u­ment to his sin­gle days in the form of his own Medi­care card.

I had made a few fu­tile ef­forts to con­vince him to come across to the fam­ily card but my de­bat­ing tech­niques were noth­ing against those of the wo­man at the x-ray fa­cil­ity who per­suaded him to do it.

So the bat­tle to get the job done be­gan. First we tried the web­site be­cause, heaven knows, no sane per­son would try to get through on the phone. But af­ter en­ter­ing all his de­tails, and de­spite ev­i­dence to the con­trary, the sys­tem de­cided Mr B didn’t ex­ist and couldn’t have a myGov ac­count.

In a mo­ment of mad­ness, we tried the phone. The first num­ber yielded a po­lite mes­sage which may as well have been the sound of some­one laugh­ing as they sar­cas­ti­cally asked whether you

re­ally thought you were go­ing to get through.

The sec­ond num­ber was more promis­ing and af­ter less than 10 min­utes on hold we were con­nected. The call taker then spent a gal­lant half-hour try­ing to do what we had just failed at but

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