The Department of Human Services removed me from my parents at the age of 13. I’m now 34 and I’ve spent years soul searching to work through my toxic childhood. I cut my father off due to past abuse and I’ve more recently cut my mother off due to ongoing harmful communication and alcoholic partners. How can I find peace in my heart with my decisions? Try to have a detached attitude and go on a fact-finding mission. Things may have got better, not changed or got worse. But at least you’ll know whether contact is the healthiest thing for you. Then let go of any judgments and acknowledge that your parents are doing the best they can. That should determine whether having them in your life is too destructive for you. Professional counselling could help.