Dead in the wa­ter

Sunday Tasmanian - Tassie Living - - MOVIES - LEIGH PAATSCH

IF you must see one movie about man- eat­ing sharks swim­ming around a su­per­mar­ket in 2012 . . . why not stay right where you are for the next three months on the off- chance an­other might come along?

For the Aus­tralian- made 3D thriller Bait is dead in the wa­ter as far as shop­per- shredding shark- at­tack movies go.

Even if you watch this dud through so- ba­dit- might- get- good eyes, which is prob­a­bly the only way to be view­ing, re­ally, Bait just can­not and will not hook you in.

All that works here is a snappy open­ing gam­bit, which has a tsunami sweep­ing the Gold Coast, thereby push­ing a pair of hun­gry great whites inside a flooded su­per­mar­ket.

How­ever, once the snappy snack­ers have ac­cli­ma­tised to their new sur­rounds – one is up­stairs swim­ming the aisles, the other is prowl­ing the car park un­der­neath – the film stops be­ing fun fast.

A scratchy screen­play is the ma­jor prob­lem here. The char­ac­ters ( a drab grab- bag of shelf stack­ers, check­out chicks, con­sumers and crooks) strug­gle to ei­ther be loved or loathed, so car­ing about their short- term sur­vival is not an op­tion.

Worse still, any at­tempt at hu­mour is a to­tal bust, and ten­sion lev­els rarely rise above nil.

Spe­cial- ef­fects are know­ingly crummy in an ironic kind of way, and pretty much com­plete the job at hand. How­ever, the rest of Bait screams of hard work that was never done. Now show­ing Vil­lage Cine­mas Once bit­ten:

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