RU­RAL RE­AL­ITY

VISIT THE EKKA FOR FLUFFY LAMBS AND POL­ISHED PUMP­KINS, BUT THE REAL SHOW STARTS WHEN THE CITY COMES TO THE COUN­TRY

The Gold Coast Bulletin - Gold Coast Eye - - BEAUTY - WORDS: CHANTAY LO­GAN

Over the hill in Bris­bane they’re start­ing to wind down that quiet lit­tle af­fair known to ab­so­lutely no one as the Royal Queens­land Show.

The Ekka, as it’s known to ab­so­lutely ev­ery­one, is about scoff­ing straw­berry sun­daes, stock­pil­ing show­bags and that other in­evitable s-word you get when you com­bine too many dag­wood dogs with rides like The Hang­over.

The Ekka is also when the coun­try wipes the mud off its R.M. Wil­liams and comes to the city. Per­son­ally, I say save your pop­corn and fairyfloss for a far more en­ter­tain­ing show: when the city comes to the coun­try.

I’ve had the plea­sure of tak­ing many of my mates back home to the prop­erty where I grew up and there’s noth­ing quite like watch­ing them pick their way across a cow pad­dock in heels or Hava­ianas.

I’ve had to pull the frozen peas out of the freezer for a friend who at­tempted to hug the wrong end of a horse – pat­ting zoos have a lot to an­swer for.

There’s an open-door pol­icy in the coun­try. Ev­ery­body’s welcome, so don’t be alarmed if next door’s live­stock wake you up wan­der­ing through the bed­room. And we may as well get all of the in­tro­duc­tions out of the way early – the hunts­man in the toi­let is Incy Wincy (it’s ironic) and you can call the car­pet snake on the ve­randa Cud­dles. Ev­ery­body knows ev­ery­body in small towns, so the toocool-for-school act won’t fly.

That guy you cut off at the round­about is the only snake catcher within 200km.

It pales in com­par­i­son to the un­speak­able sin of tak­ing a 10-minute shower as one un­wit­ting sleep­over guest found.

Dad was forced to run the cold wa­ter in the kitchen to smoke her out. She failed to re­alise baths are an an­nual oc­ca­sion, re­served for when it rains and the tank over­flows.

If the om­nipresent coat­ing of dust is get­ting to you, you could al­ways take a dip in the dam – just be care­ful not to swal­low any of the wa­ter, the cows have left a few sur­prises in there.

“THERE’S NOTH­ING QUITE LIKE WATCH­ING THEM PICK THEIR WAY ACROSS A COW PAD­DOCK IN HEELS OR HAVA­IANAS.”

RECKON

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