In Light of Re­cent Events

The Monthly (Australia) - - CONTENTS - by Oslo Davis

Hey, ladies! Check out these #MeToo-era Tin­der pro­files you may have missed.

KEITH, 47 For­mer child star of ‘Hey, That’s My Pizza!’

Look­ing to for­give a wounded vic­tim of a fe­ro­cious #MeToo cam­paign whose life has been ir­re­vo­ca­bly de­stroyed? Girls, I’m the man for you!

SHANE, 47 Net­works op­er­a­tive (in­bound)

Be­cause you to­tally need a guy to pat on the back, com­pli­ment reg­u­larly and put up with no mat­ter how much he talks over you.

NATHAN, 47 Lo­gis­tics an­a­lyst

Lonely, with much mansplain­ing to give and manspread­ing to share.

STEVE, 47 Civil com­plaints com­plainant

Am into model ship build­ing, on­line VR gam­ing and long walks on the beach in the rain by my­self. Leave me the hell alone!

JA­SON, 47 Free­lance team builder

Not on Tin­der to meet peo­ple per se, just stalk­ing my ex! (Jenny, if you’re read­ing this, I still wuv you. Also, where’d you hide the AC re­mote?)

PHIL, 47 Ses­sional tu­to­rial as­sis­tant (ca­sual)

PhD in women’s stud­ies. Ba­si­cally wrote the book on what it’s like to be a woman, from a man’s per­spec­tive! Cre­ator of #MeTooToo.

CRISPIN, 47 So­cial-me­dia com­menter (full time)

En­thu­si­as­tic men’s rights ac­tivist in­volved in cam­paigns to stop pa­ter­nity fraud, male cir­cum­ci­sion and wide­spread fe­male priv­i­lege. Non­smoker.

PAUL, 47 Sys­tems con­sul­tee

Sooky. Sulky. Atro­cious lis­tener. (Mummy didn’t love me.)

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