‘Fem­i­nists’ can’t even stom­ach a sand­wich

The Sunday Telegraph (Sydney) - - NEWS - MI­RANDA DEVINE

WHEN young Syd­ney mother Mad­die asked her closed Face­book group of 26,186 moth­ers for some tasty al­ter­na­tives to sand­wiches for her hus­band’s lunches, she wasn’t ex­pect­ing the back­lash.

“I would love to hear what other mums make their hub­bies for lunch and snacks through­out the work day,” she posted on Tues­day. “We are get­ting over sand­wiches.”

You would think she’d asked for a hem­lock recipe, judg­ing by the tor­rent of scold­ing which erupted.

She was noth­ing but a “slave” and a “1950s house­wife”.

She was “weird” and no one in their right mind or a “pink fit” would do some­thing so de­mean­ing as make their hus­band lunch. Let alone snacks.

“Your hus­band is a grown up and you’re not his mother”, wrote one mem­ber of the North Shore Mums Face­book group.

“My hus­band can make his own damn lunch.”

“I make my hus­band the same thing he makes me. Noth­ing!!”

“Stuff that, hubby is a grown man. I al­ready do his laun­dry and keep his chil­dren alive.”

“Our ad­vice is to stop mak­ing his lunches.”

“My role is child­care dur­ing work­ing hours and that’s it.”

“He’s lucky if I de­cide to make din­ner some nights”.

“I was mar­ried for twenty years and my favourite packed lunch for my hus­band was called a Get it Your­self with a side or­der of I’m not your mother.”

“Nope, I didn’t sign up for that at the al­tar. But in the spirit of be­ing help­ful … pick­led onion stuffed in man­darins”.

Leader of the at­tack pack was Polly Dun­ning, daugh­ter of pro­fes­sional fem­i­nist Jane Caro, and mother of a tod­dler about whom she in­fa­mously wrote last year, re­count­ing her hor­ror at find­ing out she was preg­nant with a boy: “I felt sick at the thought of some­thing male grow­ing in­side me.”

Dun­ning (pic­tured below) told Mad­die: “You should pack him noth­ing for lunch. And you didn’t re­ally ask for ad­vice, you asked what other ‘mums’ pack their ‘hub­bies’ (which, to me, is slightly weird phras­ing, but what­ever).” Game on. Amid the cute pics of ba­bies and birth­day cakes, a toxic wave of man-hat­ing fem­i­nism is seep­ing into the world of moth­ers on­line.

Where un­happy wives used to con­fine their bitch­ing about hus­bands to a hand­ful of girl­friends at Mos­man cafes, a new gen­er­a­tion of women is over­shar­ing with vast net­works of strangers.

On Wed­nes­day, Mad­die, 22, switched off com­ments, but not be­fore page ad­min­is­tra­tors deleted the nas­ti­est.

“I’m ac­tu­ally so dev­as­tated about some of these com­ments,” wrote Mad­die.

She and her hus­band are sav­ing up to buy their first home and, “he works in an ex­tremely phys­i­cally de­mand­ing job, he does house­work, he cooks din­ner ev­ery sec­ond night ... He gets up in the mid­dle of the night with our Bub. He is a cham­pion.

“The least I can do is make him a bloody sand­wich. I love my man, he de­serves to eat lunch and we can’t af­ford to eat out.”

Dun­ning re­sponded a few hours later: “We are not, any of us, just mums. Mum is one of the many roles we have as women and a role that cer­tainly does not in­clude do­ing any­thing for our part­ners be­cause we’re not his (or her) mother. Just struck me as weird to put mak­ing a hus­band’s lunch with the role of Mum.”

How did mak­ing a sand­wich be­come a crime against women? Thank­fully, for every­thing bad about so­cial me­dia there is an an­ti­dote, and an army of mums sprang to Mad­die’s de­fence.

“Is it re­ally a mas­sive is­sue if Mad­die wants to make her hus­band lunch?!?”

“Wow, so much hos­til­ity here …. Surely nice ac­tions like these get re­cip­ro­cated in happy mar­riages.”

“Good on you! My hus­band is a builder, and his job is so phys­i­cal, and he is so hands on at home! It’s the least I can do”.

“I never know why these posts al­ways turn into a hus­band bash­ing”.

“I think it’s pretty crappy to as­sume some­one is a slave or 1950s house­wife for mak­ing lunch. Fem­i­nism is about choice.”

“All I can say is some women re­ally must re­sent their hus­bands by their re­sponses. Look­ing af­ter your part­ner is the way to a happy mar­riage.”

“I’m so con­fused by the neg­a­tiv­ity on this post. I love mak­ing my hubby lunch … He does so much for us as a fam­ily and for my girls I see noth­ing wrong with want­ing to look af­ter your hus­band!!”

“If I can help in some small part to make his day eas­ier, I will. His hours are ridicu­lous and if me do­ing this means he gets to hang out with our son more I am all for it!”

“He does so much for me and the kids. Mak­ing two sand­wiches a day doesn’t put us in the dark ages.”

“Mar­riage is a part­ner­ship. If only more think like that there will be a lot less di­vorces in this world.”

This is the truth Baby Boomer fem­i­nists refuse to ad­mit.

Con­sid­er­a­tion and give and take is the se­cret to a happy mar­riage, not treat­ing the fa­ther of your chil­dren like an agent of the en­emy pa­tri­archy.

It’s time to end the war of the sexes, even if it means mak­ing the odd sand­wich.

Moth­ers are bul­ly­ing one another on­line in the guise of fem­i­nist de­bate.

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