Who’s really in Sheen’s corner?
Charlie Sheen has got a new show. Seen it yet? It’s called Sheen’s Korner. When it streamed live over the internet it opened with 100,000 viewers. Sadly that number dwindled to five by the end of the show but inexplicably it has since drawn over 2 million viewers.
So what does Charlie Sheen feature on a show about himself? Why he flashes his new tattoo, which says ‘ winning’, features fart noises as special effects, and recites very bad poetry. By the show’s conclusion even Sheen admitted that it ‘‘ was treasonous to the movement’’.
Not quite sure what that means, but then I don’t understand half of what Charlie Sheen says.
I was one of the 2 million people that signed up to his twitter account just so that I could understand him more. Actually I’m a sheep and do what everyone else does, but my first reason is nobler.
I’m really liking his tweets featuring tiger blood, Adonis DNA and fire-breathing fists. But, then I got a bit confused with all the trolls, warlocks and apocalypses.
There has also been a lot of comings and goings at Sheen Lodge. The police have removed his infant sons and his PR agent has quit, but he’s shacked up with two Goddesses and he’s just employed an intern to take care of all his social media commitments.
I’m loving the Goddesses – so shades of Hugh Hefner. Goddess 1 is a bikini model and Goddess 2 is a porn star. She’s a bit flighty the porn star. She left him this week and then came back. Apparently her mother is worried about her. Mum’s do worry, don’t they? Mum doesn’t worry that G2 is a porn star though, she’s just concerned about what a bad influence Charlie Sheen is.
There might be something in that though. Let’s be frank – he’s not a very nice man to women. He shot Kelly Preston, beat up two porn stars and his last two wives have taken out restraining orders against him – that’ll happen when you pull a knife. Of course Sheen says that they are all just liars and trolls.
Poor Charlie. He doesn’t know whether he’s a misogynist or just plain misunderstood.