Are you sure that’s a problem?
There’s always plenty to get offended about if you look hard enough
THIS is a column about idiots who take offence at everything, so if you’re an idiot who takes offence at everything, you might want to stop reading now.
If you do want to continue, then please do not send me your letters. Send them to someone who might actually care like, say, The Guardian. For it was The Guardian that broke the groundbreaking expose of rancour in the ABC over a Sunday Life magazine cover story on its high- profile TV presenters.
Obviously The Guardian writing about Fairfax writing about the ABC has all the hallmarks of a balltearing yarn but sadly this was one not destined for a happy ending.
Instead the Sunday Life article was variously described as “silly and demeaning”, “deeply disturbing” and “so insensitive” and also reported the shock revelation that the ABC workplace had “a two- tiered system” – which is about eight tiers less than most workplaces but at least one tier more than socialism. Anyway, here’s a scoop: This is NOT A REAL PROBLEM.
Yet just as I was recovering from that grave injustice, I came across another tale of cruel oppression.
This was the heart- wrenching tale of a woman who was ashamed to tell people she lived in Brighton and instead felt obliged to tell them she was slumming it in nearby Sandringham.
That, according to her piece in the Bayside Leader, is because she lives in fear of being judged as too posh.
The author is an aspiring young journalist so I don’t want to be harsh — nor, heaven forbid, judge her. Rather I merely hope to help her develop her news judgment by advising: This is NOT A REAL PROBLEM.
But of course it’s been a big week in international news as well, and no bigger than in the US where Target stores are selling women’s T- shirts with the word TROPHY on them in an attempt to capture the lucrative pre- bridal market.
Needless to say there is already a petition afoot that has amassed more than 13,000 signatures.
As the petition’s creator writes: “Labelling any person as a trophy is demeaning their humanity and objectifying them as a tangible object that can be bought, used and disposed of.”
Now I don’t want to be pedantic, but technically the very concept of a trophy is that it cannot be bought but rather has to be won. Indeed, the only thing at risk of being bought is the T- shirt — presumably by someone who wants to own it.
And so, after careful consideration: This is NOT A REAL PROBLEM.
But please don’t let that stop you being offended. It is vital you maintain the rage so that world leaders can stop being distracted by terrorism, Iran getting the bomb, asylum seekers dying at sea, unemployment, Greece in meltdown, a crisis in health care, Third World poverty, unaffordable housing, indigenous disadvantage and other meaningless issues.
After all, someone’s got to keep things in perspective.