Peggy’s Place

In Spot­lights ganz eigenem Pub treibt sich mit­ten in der Nacht ein unge­betener Gast herum – oder haben die eige­nar­ti­gen Geräusche vielle­icht eine an­dere Ur­sache? Von INEZ SHARP


Visit Spot­light’s very own Lon­don pub

Peggy: What on earth is that huge par­cel you’ve got there?

Sean: It’s the floor lamp I bought last week for my flat. I told you about it.

Ge­orge: Why’s it all wrapped up?

Sean: I’m tak­ing it back. It just doesn’t look good, and I can’t read by it ei­ther. Peggy: Didn’t it come in a box?

Sean: Yes, but I was so con­vinced that it would be per­fect stand­ing be­side my new sofa that I threw the box away.

Ge­orge: That’s some imag­i­na­tive pack­ag­ing for you!

Sean: Well, there are three glass shades, and they’re re­ally del­i­cate, so I took a lot of care wrap­ping it all up.

Peggy: Where did you buy it?

Sean: Oh, in this de­signer light­ing shop in the West End. I’ve had my eye on it for ages. It cost a for­tune.

Ge­orge: Will they take it back?

Sean: I called them to­day, and they said they would — as long as it’s in per­fect nick, of course. I’ll go there first thing to­mor­row. As we’re about to shut up, can I leave it here, just till to­mor­row, Peggy?

Peggy: Of course, love! Put it be­hind the bar, where it’ll be safe.

Ge­orge: OK, I’m off. See you all soon. Sean: Can I leave you to lock up, Peggy? Then I can go out with Ge­orge.

Peggy: That’s fine, dear! Good night! Ge­orge & Sean: Good night!

Peggy: (to her­self) Right, that’s locked. Now, I’ll leave the door open here to the stairs. Phil will be home any minute. (phone rings) Hello, Phil!...yes, I’m on my way up­stairs to the flat... In a cou­ple of min­utes? OK, fine. See you then. Bye!

(loud crash) Peggy: What was that? (an­other, smaller crash­ing sound) Peggy: It’s com­ing from down­stairs. Ei­ther from the kitchen or the bar. I’d bet­ter call Phil. (whis­per­ing) Phil, it’s me. I think there’s a bur­glar in the pub… What should I do? … Noth­ing here ex­cept that big old um­brella some­one left be­hind... Through the back door? Right, I’ll wait for you on the stairs.

(a few min­utes later) Phil: (whis­per­ing) Are you there, Peggy? Why have you switched off the light? Peggy: I thought it would be harder for the bur­glar to find his way around, but we know the pub.

Phil: Good point! Have you got that um­brella?

Peggy: Shouldn’t we just call the po­lice? Phil: No, I’m go­ing to deal with this. Just wait till I get my hands on that...

Peggy: Oh, my God! There’s a body! Can you see the feet stick­ing out from be­hind the bar?

Phil: Yes, stay back. He’s prob­a­bly try­ing to trick us by ly­ing down. Noth­ing that a good hard blow to the head won’t cure. Here goes!

Peggy: Funny, that sounded like break­ing glass. Try prod­ding him.

Phil: You’re right. He’s a funny shape, too, and he’s not mov­ing. Put the light on.

Peggy: Oh, no! It can’t be! Yes, it is! It’s Sean’s lamp.

Phil: Well, you can un­der­stand my mis­take. It doesn’t look like a lamp, does it? More like a mummy. What the hell is he do­ing leav­ing it in the bar, any­way?

Peggy: I’ll ex­plain in a mo­ment. Let me take a look... Oh, no! Bro­ken into a thou­sand pieces. Can you pour me an ex­tra large brandy?

“Can you see the feet stick­ing out from be­hind the bar?”

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