WHO YOU LOVE? YOU OR YOUR CHIL­DREN!

Business Bhutan - - Editoria - LOBSANG NIMA The writer blogs at lobzangn.blogspot.com

I met an old friend after years and we talked about fam­ily, re­la­tion­ships and com­pro­mises over some beer. As our talk delved into se­ri­ous­ness, we talked about chil­dren and their fu­ture. Of course, I don’t have any now! He is a fa­ther of two beau­ti­ful girls. We then got into talk­ing about the fu­ture of his girls. He ex­pects his daugh­ters to look after him when old and frail. I re­tal­i­ated say­ing how can you ex­pect your chil­dren to do that? Kids change and they change fast and I could put this shrewd fact into his brains.

Men marry in haste and women in cu­rios­ity! At least that’s what I have mostly found out to be. You have put on so much ef­fort to keep your rai­son d’être in­tact of be­ing in love, get­ting mar­ried and hav­ing chil­dren.

Upon com­par­i­son, friends de­clare, I have my kid in the 3rd grade. I think you and oth­ers like you will have chil­dren when you grow old and who will look after you. I don’t know but I am not ex­pect­ing my chil­dren to look after me when I am old. What worth are you when you as the sup­posed bread win­ner can’t se­cure an old age re­tire­ment scheme be­sides se­cur­ing your chil­dren’s fu­ture!

Ex­pect­ing your young to look after you is ab­surd in to­day’s nat­u­ral world. I don’t want to of­fend the ones who do look after their par­ents now with pas­sion. But the fact is, will all of to­day’s chil­dren be a re­spon­si­ble adult in fu­ture? I can­not even imag­ine how will be mine!

In a fairly tra­di­tional fam­ily set up like ours, the sup­posed hus­bands or ‘Mag­pas’ don’t have the right when it comes to the wife’s fam­ily af­fairs. This sys­tem has been hered­i­tary and peo­ple still hold onto such be­lief no mat­ter how­ever mod­ern one is. The towns­peo­ple now may find this ridicu­lous but ask any coun­try bump­kin about this prac­tice. The wealth of the fam­ily should be kept within the fam­ily-that’s why the women folks not the men.

The point is peo­ple change, time changes, gen­er­a­tions change and with it changes oc­cur in ev­ery sphere of one’s life. So it’s high time that par­ents now must work a lit­tle ex­tra to save it for the grey old days for them­selves, oth­er­wise you never know! And ex­pect­ing your chil­dren to look after you when frail is now a thing of the past. Also, you can­not even de­fend for sure whether or not you child will be there to home you later in life! Per­haps a huge food for thought and a thing to pon­der upon!

Will you now start work­ing for the ben­e­fit of you and your chil­dren?

PS: This is just a lop­sided opin­ion of my con­ver­sa­tion with an old mate and read­ers can draw your own con­clu­sions about the fu­ture of your own be­sides work­ing for your chil­dren’s fu­ture.

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