Fish lover won­ders if she should bring her own en­tree

Cape Breton Post - - LIFESTYLES -

Dear An­nie: I am 49 years old and have been a “flexitarian” for 10 years, with fish be­ing my pri­mary pro­tein source. My ques­tion is this: When I go to other peo­ple’s homes for din­ner en­gage­ments, should they pro­vide a fish en­tree ( for me), should I be sat­is­fied go­ing veg­e­tar­ian for the meal, or should I bring my own?

My friends usu­ally pro­vide for me, as do my in­laws. But my par­ents and sib­lings do not. Even at hol­i­day gath­er­ings, I bring my own en­tree while the oth­ers are eat­ing prime beef.

When I en­ter­tain, I pay spe­cial at­ten­tion to all of my guests’ di­ets from veg­e­tar­ian to meat lovers, and I ex­pect to get the same re­spect in re­turn. Am I wrong? — M.F.

Dear M.F.: Most flex­i­tar­i­ans are will­ing to try meat on oc­ca­sion. We would con­sider you a pesc­etar­ian — one who eats fish but not meat. Those who know about your food choices should make some ad­just­ment when they in­vite you. How­ever, you can­not de­mand it. Your fam­ily mem­bers seem par­tic­u­larly unac­com­mo­dat­ing, but they are en­ti­tled to serve what they wish. Most veg­e­tar­i­ans and pesc­etar­i­ans can find plenty to eat in the side dishes. It is fine, how­ever, to bring your own en­tree if your hosts do not ob­ject.

Dear An­nie: How do I deal with chain smokers in the work­place? My of­fice has a no-smok­ing pol­icy, and our state re­cently passed laws to that ef­fect, but we still must en­dure peo­ple smok­ing one cig­a­rette right af­ter the other.

My fel­low work­ers and I have made com­ments about the sec­ond­hand smoke and have posted var­i­ous brochures and ar­ti­cles on the sub­ject on the bul­letin board. We have put up “NO SMOK­ING” signs, to no avail. Any­thing we do just seems to make th­ese peo­ple puff more.

You can al­ways tell where smokers have been by the ash, smoke and cig­a­rette smell. Heaven help the poor per­son who has to ride with a smoker in one of our com­pany trucks to a job site when it’s be­low zero and you have to hang your head out the win­dow to gasp for air. Past ef­forts to get smokers to con­trol their habit have only got­ten smoke blown in our faces, lit­er­ally.

The prob­lem is fur­ther com­pounded by the fact that our com­pany man­ager and other top com­pany of­fi­cials are also heavy smokers. We are hes­i­tant to ask man­age­ment di­rectly to do any­thing about the smok­ing be­cause of pos­si­ble job reper­cus­sions. What can we do be­fore we all die of lung can­cer? — Up in Smoke

Dear Smoke: Un­less you are will­ing to re­port your boss (and the other smokers) to the po­lice for vi­o­lat­ing state law, there isn’t much you can do. If your work­place has a hu­man re­sources depart­ment, try lodg­ing a com­plaint there. Oth­er­wise, you might get bet­ter re­sults by talk­ing to your boss, calmly and without judg­ment, ex­plain­ing that the sec­ond­hand smoke is mak­ing it dif­fi­cult for the rest of you to breathe and you’d be most ap­pre­cia­tive if he would set a good ex­am­ple.

Dear An­nie: May I add one more re­sponse to “Go­ing Gray”? I am 55 years old and lost my lovely red hair due to chemo­ther­apy. It grew back a dull brown, so I started to colour it.

I later be­gan dat­ing Andy, who is 12 years younger and was al­ready dye­ing his hair and beard when we met. I never gave it a thought un­til he was ad­mit­ted to the CCU with heart is­sues and the nurse said to him, “Gosh, it’s nice that your mother came with you.”

I knew I had a keeper when Andy let his hair go back to its nat­u­ral and lovely gray. We mar­ried the fol­low­ing Oc­to­ber. (I still colour my hair.) — Ju­lia

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