Notes on nail ac­cep­tance.

ELLE (Canada) - - Beauty -

To those with long, healthy nail beds: We know you well. You have nails that man­i­curists con­stantly coo over dur­ing sa­lon vis­its—nails that some­how look long even when they’re short. This is by luck/birth/ parent­age. En­joy your po­si­tion of pres­tige, but, please, use your supreme pow­ers for good, not evil. Ac­cept that you will never truly live with the an­guish of nail is­sues; as a re­sult, you aren’t fully liv­ing the true hu­man ex­pe­ri­ence. To those with short, stubby nail beds: The first step in find­ing hap­pi­ness is to ig­nore those with long, healthy nail beds who are reap­ing the ben­e­fits of ge­net­ics they had no con­trol over. Revel in the dark, dra­matic pol­ishes you can rock with­out ever look­ing over­done or out­ra­geous. You are sin­gle-hand­edly re­spon­si­ble for keep­ing the “nail growth and care” sec­tion of the drug­store in busi­ness— a no­ble con­tri­bu­tion to so­ci­ety and cap­i­tal­ism.

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