Your mind – Power

Montreal Times - - News -

Iam still on about mind­ful­ness. Be in the mo­ment!! In­habit the present (breathe). Mind­ful­ness has been found to in­oc­u­late peo­ple against ag­gres­sive im­pulses ac­cord­ing to Whit­ney Hepp­ner and Michael Ker­nis of the Univer­sity of Ge­or­gia. They did an in­ter­est­ing study show­ing that those who par­tic­i­pated in a mind­ful ex­pe­ri­ence prior to be­ing pro­voked in an­other ex­er­cise, were un­will­ing to in­flict pain on oth­ers. Those who did not par­tic­i­pate in a mind­ful ex­pe­ri­ence prior to be­ing pro­voked by so­cial re­jec­tion took it out on other peo­ple. "Mind­ful­ness de­creases ego in­volve­ment," ex­plains Ker­nis. "So peo­ple are less likely to link their self-es­teem to events and more likely to take things at face value." Mind­ful­ness also makes peo­ple feel more con­nected to other peo­ple— that em­pathic feel­ing of be­ing "at one with the uni­verse."

Mind­ful­ness boosts your aware­ness of how you in­ter­pret and re­act to what's hap­pen­ing in your mind. It in­creases the gap be­tween emo­tional im­pulse and ac­tion, al­low­ing you to do what Bud­dhists call rec­og­niz­ing the spark be­fore the flame. Fo­cus­ing on the present re­boots your mind so you can re­spond thought­fully rather than au­to­mat­i­cally. In­stead of lash­ing out in anger, back­ing down in fear, or mind­lessly in­dulging a pass­ing crav­ing, you get the op­por­tu­nity to say to your­self, "This is the emo­tion I'm feel­ing. How should I re­spond?" Mind­ful­ness in­creases self-con­trol; since you're not get­ting thrown by threats to your self-es­teem, you're bet­ter able to reg­u­late your be­hav­ior.There is a sim­ple ex­er­cise you can do any­where, any­time to in­duce mind­ful­ness: Breathe.There is no bet­ter way to bring your­self into the present mo­ment than to fo­cus on your breath­ing. Be­cause you're plac­ing your aware­ness on what's hap­pen­ing right now, you are in the present mo­ment.Try to see if you can con­cen­trate on your breath­ing and be some­where else. It can’t hap­pen.

An­other tip for to­day is If some­thing is both­er­ing you, move to­ward it rather than away from it. Ac­cept it.We all have pain in our lives, whether it's the ex we still long for, the jack­ham­mer blast­ing across the street, or the sud­den wave of anx­i­ety when we get up to give a speech. If we let them, such ir­ri­tants can dis­tract us from the en­joy­ment of life. Para­dox­i­cally, the ob­vi­ous re­sponse to fo­cus on the prob­lem in or­der to com­bat and over­come it—often makes it worse, ar­gues Stephen Hayes, a psy­chol­o­gist at the Univer­sity of Ne­vada. The mind's nat­u­ral ten­dency when faced with pain is to at­tempt to avoid it by try­ing to re­sist un­pleas­ant thoughts, feel­ings, and sen­sa­tions. When we lose a love, for in­stance, we fight our feel­ings of sad­ness.As we get older, we work hard to re­cap­ture our youth.When we're sit­ting in the den­tist's chair wait­ing for a painful root canal, we wish we were any­where but there. But in many cases, neg­a­tive feel­ings and sit­u­a­tions can't be avoided and re­sist­ing them only mag­ni­fies the pain.

The prob­lem is we have not just pri­mary emo­tions but also sec­ondary ones. We have emo­tions about other emo­tions. We get stressed out and then think, "I wish I weren't so stressed out." The pri­mary emo­tion is stress over your work­load. The sec­ondary emo­tion is feel­ing, "I hate be­ing stressed." It doesn't have to be this way.The so­lu­tion is ac­cep­tance. Let the emo­tion be there. Be open to the way things are in each mo­ment with­out try­ing to ma­nip­u­late or change the ex­pe­ri­ence and with­out judg­ing it, cling­ing to it, or push­ing it away. The present mo­ment can only be as it is. Try­ing to change it only frus­trates and ex­hausts you. Ac­cep­tance re­lieves you of this need­less ex­tra suf­fer­ing. Learn to say “feel­ings of loss are nor­mal and nat­u­ral. It's OK for me to feel this way." Ac­cep­tance of an un­pleas­ant state doesn't mean you don't have goals for the fu­ture. It just means you ac­cept that cer­tain things are be­yond your con­trol. The sad­ness, stress, pain, or anger is there whether you like it or not. It helps to ac­cept what we can­not change. Ac­cep­tance doesn’t mean you have to like what's hap­pen­ing. "Ac­cep­tance of the present mo­ment has noth­ing to do with res­ig­na­tion," writes Ka­batZinn. "Ac­cep­tance doesn't tell you what to do.What hap­pens next, what you choose to do; that has to come out of your un­der­stand­ing of this mo­ment." If you feel anx­i­ety, for in­stance, you can ac­cept the feel­ing, la­bel it as anx­i­ety—then di­rect your at­ten­tion to some­thing else in­stead. You watch your thoughts, per­cep­tions, and emo­tions flit through your mind with­out get­ting in­volved.Thoughts are just thoughts. You don't have to be­lieve them and you don't have to do what they say. Play­fully have your thoughts but when they try to get you to ru­mi­nate about the past over and over or worry about what might hap­pen in the fu­ture get the hook. Pull your­self back to the here and now. Try it!! It might work for you.

Com­ments, ideas, sug­ges­tions are wel­come. Con­tact me: donna@ash­ Or at 514-695-3131

Monday to Fri­day be­tween 8:30 to 4:30. Health Ac­cess Home &

Nurs­ing Care www.ash­

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