That’s Ou­tra­geous!

Reader's Digest (Canada) - - Contents - BY NATHANIEL BASEN

FOR­BID­DEN FRUIT On Novem­ber 1, 2017, young shop­pers at the ASDA Hulme Su­per­store in Manch­ester, U.K., had to show iden­ti­fi­ca­tion to pur­chase four things: pre­scrip­tion drugs, al­co­hol, to­bacco and…kiwi fruit. Dur­ing a con­cert a few nights prior, singer Harry Styles had slipped on­stage while per­form­ing a song that shares a name with the green-fleshed vineberry; the furry-skinned fruit had been launched from the crowd be­low. Styles was un­harmed (he held his mic stand for sup­port). ASDA, the su­per­store’s par­ent com­pany, didn’t want to en­dan­ger Styles, so to pre­vent a re­peat at­tack at his show that night, se­cu­rity po­liced the sale of ki­wis to any­one un­der 25.


In Corona, Calif., this past Au­gust, a dar­ing din­ner­time res­cue gave way to a lovely friend­ship. Becky Garfinkel was part­way through her spring­mix salad, pur­chased from Tar­get, when she found a life­less, dime-sized frog in her dish. Garfinkel watched agog as her hus­band gave one-fin­ger chest com­pres­sions to the am­phib­ian. The valiant ef­fort suc­ceeded—the frog was re­vived, and Garfinkel de­cided to keep him. For their trou­ble, the cou­ple says they re­ceived a $5 Tar­get gift card and a new pet, named “Lucky.”


Last year, in Bret­ten, Ger­many, po­lice in­ves­ti­gated what one man thought was an un­det­o­nated weapon from the Sec­ond World

War. They were right to be cau­tious: A few months ear­lier, a sim­i­lar sit­u­a­tion ne­ces­si­tated a 60,000-per­son evac­u­a­tion in nearby Frankfurt. Af­ter closer ex­am­i­na­tion, though, it was de­ter­mined that the sus­pi­cious item wasn’t a bomb but a zuc­chini. In­ves­ti­ga­tors ad­mit­ted that the of­fend­ing squash did ap­pear ne­far­i­ous, but they con­cluded that a neigh­bour likely threw it over the el­derly man’s fence. The toss has not, as of this writ­ing, been de­clared an act of war.

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