Reader's Digest (Canada) - - Health -

Q: What gets wet­ter the more it dries?

A: A towel. red­

YOU DON’T KNOW FEAR un­til you hear your two-year-old flush the toi­let and yell “bye-bye” from the hall bath­room. @LILWESTMAN

FRIEND: “I can’t wait to have kids!” ME: “Yeah, you’ll love it!” I yell over my one-year-old, who’s scream­ing in my face be­cause I’m chew­ing gum.

@THEBABYLADY7 MY FAVOURITE THING about watch­ing a new movie with my five-yearold is prob­a­bly watch­ing it 17 times a day for the next three months.

@NOT_THAT_MOM MY KIDS TRIED TO SUR­PRISE me for my birth­day this morn­ing. I to­tally heard them com­ing and snuck out to start a new life some­where else. Ac­tor RYAN REYNOLDS

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