As Kids See It

Reader's Digest International - - Contents -

MY FRIEND A NURSE, was re­view­ing a pa­tient’s med­i­cal records when she re­al­ized the girl and her mother shared the same first name.

“Doesn’t that ever get con­fus­ing?” my friend asked.

“Oh no,” the girl replied. “I just call her Mom.” BETH NEL­SON

AF­TER THE DEATH OF an el­derly fam­ily friend, my seven-year-old grand­daugh­ter, Zoe, asked her mom to de­scribe heaven. Her mother strug­gled to an­swer, even­tu­ally re­ply­ing that while we can’t know ex­actly what heaven is like, it’s said to be a won­der­ful and peace­ful place. Zoe thought about that very se­ri­ously for a few min­utes, then replied, “Well, Mommy, when you get there, will you send me a text and tell me about it?” JANE MAR­SHALL

AF­TER MUCH de­lib­er­a­tion, my seven-year-old said it was okay for me to tell him to go to bed. Thanks, buddy. @FATHERWITHTWINS

MY SON FIRST TOOK a plane at the age of four. He was scared about fly­ing, so he told the flight at­ten­dant he wanted the plane not to “fly” but in­stead to “get go­ing on the road!” Play­ing along, she agreed. As the plane sped down the run­way, my son called out, “When I said ‘On the road,’ I didn’t mean so fast!”

ANA CAROLINA CARRILLO A TOD­DLER CAN DO more in one un­su­per­vised minute than most peo­ple can do all day.

@MAMABIRDDIARIES WHILE ON A FAM­ILY va­ca­tion in the Vir­gin Is­lands, I went for a walk with my six-year-old grand­son, Mat­teo. We spot­ted a species of tree that we’d never seen be­fore, with spiky thorns that climbed up its slen­der trunk. It looked like a dragon’s back. Mat­teo pointed at it. “How did it get like that?” he asked.

This was a chance to in­tro­duce him to the idea of evo­lu­tion. We sat on the ground and talked for 45 min­utes. It was glo­ri­ous.

The next day, he was swim­ming with his cousin and asked her a ques­tion. She said, “That sounds like a sci­ence ques­tion. Why don’t you ask Grandpa?”

“I’m not mak­ing that mis­take again,” he replied. ac­tor ALAN ALDA

KIDS CAN BE NO­TO­RI­OUSLY picky eaters. Just ask any par­ent:

“I like meat, pasta and cheese. Un­less you mix them all to­gether. Then I don’t like it.”

—My eight-year-old on lasagna

@DOMESTICGODDSS I never knew that pars­ley had the power to de­stroy some­one’s life, but six leaves of it in my kid’s rice has taught me oth­er­wise.

@SIX_PACK_MOM NOT SURE IF I SHOULD be more con­cerned about the son who locked me out of my bed­room to­day, or the one who showed me how to pick the lock. @AMYDILLON

WHER­EVER YOU ARE, wher­ever you go, re­mem­ber: a baby is plot­ting to grab the sun­glasses off your face.

@PARENTNORMAL MY SIX-YEAR-OLD just got her­self dressed then walked around mak­ing ev­ery­one here sign a pa­per agree­ing that her out­fit looked good.

@MAUGHAMMOM ME: Where is the li­brary book? TOD­DLER: My dog ate it.

ME: We don’t have a dog.

@YENNIWHITE

“My par­ents ac­tu­ally met each other in per­son.”

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