THE CRAZY THINGS PEOPLE SAID WHILE ASLEEP
Just last week, my eight-yearold daughter rolled over in my bed, where she’d fallen asleep, and said, “Mmm ... I want pizza.” (Pause) “And a beer.” I nearly fell out of bed laughing.
My wife told me last month that while I was sleeping, I said, “Set the burrito trap.”
My mom told me I’d once said, “Don’t go to that party, R2. They have spaghetti. It’ll mess up your circuits.”
My dad was coming out of surgery. He sat up, pointed at my mom, and said, “After I get rid of her, I am going to clown school.” He then lay down and went back to sleep.
I said to my fiancé in my sleep, “I love you because you have such long antennae.”
I once told my ex I had to push the plants deeper into the plant pots, while simultaneously pushing her out of bed with both hands.