Love and Nin­tendo

RUTH DANIELL

Room Magazine - - MCMILLAN -

Home for Christ­mas, I tell my brother as lit­tle as I can: He raped me.

I just wanted you to know now.

A video game on pause on the base­ment TV, colours muted. It won’t oc­cur to me un­til later that it was sev­eral Christ­mases ago that it hap­pened: my first home­com­ing from univer­sity, what might have been the first of many long-dis­tance re­la­tion­ship re­unions and what was, in­stead—well, what it was. I don’t know the ex­act date—don’t want that kind of an­niver­sary in my head.

It’d be worse than re­mem­ber­ing that first boyfriend’s birth­day each year.

I don’t want, also, my brother to think dif­fer­ently about me now, though

I know he will. He hides his face with a pil­low. Do you have any ques­tions?

He doesn’t. He sets the pil­low back down on the couch. We un-pause the game. The TV’s colours brighten.

We take turns be­ing Mario. It’ll be ages be­fore we run out of lives.

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