In the mid­dle of a feud

Sherbrooke Record - - LOCAL SPORTS -

were not al­lowed to go to the re­cep­tion, so I didn’t go, ei­ther. When we got back to Angie’s home, she wouldn’t even talk to me. My son-in-law told me it would prob­a­bly be bet­ter if I went and spent the night else­where. I tried to ex­plain why I had sat where I did, but Angie wouldn’t even lis­ten to any­thing I said. She has not spo­ken to me or an­swered any let­ters I have sent her since. I’ve apol­o­gized many times, but she re­fuses to talk.

I love my daugh­ter very much, but I also love my grand­daugh­ter. I was try­ing to do what I thought was right by them both. My grand­daugh­ter talks to me all the time, but my daugh­ter won’t have any­thing to do with me.

How can this be re­solved so that my daugh­ter and I can be on good terms again? I am 79 years old, and my daugh­ter is 60. — Heart­bro­ken Mother and Grand­mother

Dear Heart­bro­ken Mother and Grand­mother: You didn’t cause this prob­lem, and you can’t fix it. It can be re­solved only when your daugh­ter de­cides to stop be­ing vin­dic­tive. She is us­ing you as an emo­tional punch­ing bag be­cause of the is­sues she’s hav­ing with her own daugh­ter.

What you’ve done so far — ex­plain­ing your side of the story, ex­press­ing your love — is more than enough. Now all you can do is hope she drops the at­ti­tude. In the mean­time, do keep up your re­la­tion­ship with your grand­daugh­ter, but be care­ful that she’s not us­ing you to up­set her mom. Don’t be a pawn in this petty game.

Dear An­nie: I have read many sto­ries in your col­umn of peo­ple go­ing through di­vorce or deal­ing with the fall­out. There is an or­ga­ni­za­tion called Divorce­care, which offers help for th­ese peo­ple to heal from their pain. I’ve been there. I know it works. Peo­ple need to give it a chance. You can find classes by go­ing to https://www.divorce­care.org. — Sin­gle Again

Dear Sin­gle Again: I’m sure some of my read­ers reel­ing from the pain of di­vorce will ap­pre­ci­ate this tip. Thank you.

Send your ques­tions for An­nie Lane to dear­an­nie@cre­ators.com.

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