Hubby secretive about trip to Vegas. Am I right to be upset?
Q: Several months ago, my husband planned a trip to Las Vegas with his buddies. I wasn’t pleased about it only because it was his friend who told me the plan.
A week later, he told me that a mutual female friend was also joining them. I expected the friend to tell me
that she was part of the trip. She didn’t. I was upset. We haven’t spoken since.
I don’t think this is a matter of who’s right or wrong but rather one of respect and consideration. Your thoughts, please.
His Private Plans
A: It’s not clear to whom you’re not speaking.… If it’s your female friend, that’s a side issue to resolve.
If it’s silence between you and your husband, it’s seriously wrong.
In any union, one needs to know when a partner’s taking
off on a trip — as a courtesy, and as a respectful check that the timing doesn’t interfere with the other person’s needs.
Speak up. Tell him you’re hurt that he didn’t tell you about the trip and that you’re more hurt that this woman’s involvement is almost secretive.
There may be a reasonable explanation, so don’t react ahead of getting an answer. Unless you don’t get one.
A reader asks, how can I make the people around me understand that I’m not an abuser? More Ellie advice at thestar.com/askellie