Building stone upon stone
Some of you reading this will be about to celebrate the end of the year and others still recuperating from it. Either way this period from the solstice, through Christmas, to New Year’s is a special time of the year.
This short span of days is the mortar that bonds together the annual stones from which the structure of our lifetimes is fashioned. Each stone’s shape, grain and texture is unique, created from the things that have happened to us and that we have made happen. In erecting the edifice of our lives we try to place each stone so that, despite its own particular characteristics, it will fit together with what went before and create a usable foundation for what is yet to come.
The year end is the time to eat and drink. And to mix the cement with the water in just the right proportions in order that next year’s stone will be correctly and firmly positioned. We call this making resolutions. I wondered what New Year’s resolutions various characters who people my particular world view might be making in order to get 2014 off to a good start.
I started out with Rob Ford. Inhabitants of the Funks might not have heard yet of the confused buffoon who, as I write this, is still mayor of Toronto. But as soon as the high speed Internet connection to the Funks that will be announced shortly by the provincial government goes through, Funks-dwellers too will become acquainted with the phenomenon of Ford.
My guess is that Rob Ford’s New Year’s resolution is to apologize more in 2014. He did a whole lot of it in 2013 and so far it seems to be working for him. Operating on the premise that “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,” and its corollary, “if it’s not too bad, do more of it,” Ford will continue to behave the same but go heavier on the apologies. After all, why not?
All over the USA talk shows, stand- up comedians and satire shows are all over him. As every Torontonian knows, if the Americans are paying attention to you, you must be on the right track.
Even citizens of the Funks not yet connected to broad band, which we are told as an absolute certainty will be in place on those islands before the 2015 election, are familiar with the name of our esteemed Prime Minister Stephen Harper. Readers will remember that Harper endorsed Rob Ford and Kathy Dunderdale and was, in turn, endorsed by them.
A sometimes reliable source still
holding a job within the Prime Minister’s Office tells me Harper has chosen to follow the Ford mantra: repetition.
Harper frequently begins answers to questions in the House of Commons with, “Let me be perfectly clear about this,” or “I have always said,” or some such. He then proceeds to not answer the question.
On the rare occasions when he varies from this pattern, he sometimes gets himself into a pickle. On the advice of his handlers he has resolved that in 2014 he will never say anything in the House of Commons that he hasn’t said before. This will guarantee continuity and avoid slip-ups. Furthermore, the P.M. resolves to answer questions only after clearing them with members of his inner circle whose loyalty is certain, because they are being investigated by the RCMP.
The premier of our province is way down in the polls and the future is not looking too rosy for her. This would seem to be an ideal time for her to reflect on what has gone so wrong and dream up some New Year’s resolutions to turn her fortunes around. Sadly, sources near the top floor of the Confederation Building, who may or may not be up there replacing the defective windows, tell me that the premier too has made a New Year’s resolution to stay the course. Like her colleagues in the Tory movement mentioned above, she will opt for continuity.
When members of the opposition or the public ask for explanations of what is going on with this government she resolves to dismiss their requests, citing Bill 29. If pressed further she will sneer, using that tone which leaves no doubt what part of their anatomy she thinks they are as stunned as.
When cornerstones of her pet projects seem to be crumbling she will persevere. The participation of Nova Scotia, once crucial to Muskrat Falls success, now in grave jeopardy? We never needed those Herring Chokers anyway!
Quebec gives no guarantee they will maintain water levels in the Churchill River adequate to guarantee Muskrat profitability? You see. You can never trust those people. No worries, full speed ahead.
When troweling on a new course of mortar before placing the stone for 2014, it is wise to look down, back to where you came from. If you spot something squish, out of true and neither plumb nor square, this is the time to start correcting it. Just thought I’d mention that.
Happy New Year.