Key to mar­riage, for­give of­ten

The Drumheller Mail - - CLASSIFIEDS - Diane Thomas The Drumheller Mail

Jay and Tammi Gar­butt met at a grade 10 so­cial dance class at Lind­say Thurber Com­pre­hen­sive in Red Deer. Tammi was al­most 16 ( Jay says she is much older than him) and Jay only a few months younger. They dated for eight years, got en­gaged and were mar­ried two years later on June 4, 1994.

Jay re­mem­bers the day they met and said, “Back when I was young and thin, de­fen­sive cap­tain of the foot­ball team, our two phys.ed. classes, which had been seg­re­gated, were brought to­gether for so­cial dance class. Tammi raced, lit­er­ally raced, across the room to beat some other girl, who was warm for my form, and we haven’t been apart since.”

Right af­ter the wed­ding, they went to Banff for a few days. About 7 or 8 months later, they went to Hawaii for a cou­ple of weeks. Jay ex­plains: “It was heaven. It was dif­fer­ent than nor­mal, as her dad tagged along on our Banff hon­ey­moon and my folks took us to Hawaii. Both were more of a fam­ily af­fair than a hon­ey­moon.”

When asked, what Jay loves about Tammi, he replied. “What I love about Tammi (she says be nice), I don’t know if I can nar­row this down to one thing. It is al­ways nice to know that a woman likes you first. Be­ing around her makes me feel like a bet­ter per­son. They both laugh. Tammy said, “Jay is hi­lar­i­ous and has a wicked sense of hu­mour.”

They have had many ad­ven­tures and have done a lot of trav­el­ling. One un­usual trip was the Florida va­ca­tion. Jay tells the story, “We got off the cruise ship and the ho­tel rooms were not ready. They let us have our swim­suits and gave us our tow­els. We were about 200 yards out, not very deep as we had come across a lot of sand bars. Then Tammi said, “I don’t think that dark thing was there a minute ago.” Ev­ery­one turned and said “What is it, what is it?” Some­thing popped out of the wa­ter, tri­an­gle shaped. Jay yelled to them, “It’s ex­actly what you think it is, get out of the wa­ter!” Ev­ery­one thought it was a shark! Jay said, “I was help­ing Tammi’s friend, Michelle, even though she was a life guard, only now she can’t swim too good, back to the beach. Tammi and Michelle’s hus­band made it to the shore very quickly.” Jay ex­plains, “It turned out to be a mana­tee. The mighty ma­jes­tic sea cow.” All th­ese peo­ple on the beach com­mented, “That was some­thing to see, once in a life time.” Tammi said, “That’s enough of that, we’re stay­ing at the pool.”

The key to a suc­cess­ful mar­riage is that I think you have to like your spouse.” Tammi said. Jay ex­plained: “We spend an in­or­di­nate amount of time to­gether, Tammi is my as­sis­tant but we are pretty good at com­part­men­tal­iz­ing things, ex­cept when it is very busy.”

Jay con­tin­ued, “We pretty much have learned to leave work at work. We try to have a lot of fun, we maybe spend more time to­gether than other cou­ples, but we have also de­cided that the home team is the most im­por­tant part and it comes be­fore any­thing else. We en­joy be­ing with each other, we un­der­stand each other and we have so much shared his­tory.”

Jay ex­pressed, “If you are de­cid­ing that this is the most im­por­tant re­la­tion­ship that you are ever go­ing to have, you de­cide to for­give eas­ily, be­cause you know that you are a fool your­self, and hope it will be re­cip­ro­cated.”

“If you are de­cid­ing that this is the most im­por­tant re­la­tion­ship that you are ever go­ing to have, you de­cide

to for­give eas­ily.”

Jay Gar­butt

mailphoto Diane Thomas

Jay and Tammi Gar­butt spend a lot of time

to­gether at work.

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